1. Step 1: Be a football fan. (A fan of the Washington State Cougars, in this case.)
2. Step 2: Watch your team get blown out (Washington State lost tonight to Stanford 55-17) and become increasingly depressed.
3. Step 3: Give up completely on football, dignity, and the entire concept of civilized society and just dump a giant plastic sack of popcorn on your face because it’s easier than using your hands to eat.
“Fuck this shit.” —Washington State Popcorn Guy
4. We’ve all been there.
9. Stay safe tonight, Washington State Popcorn Guy.
- An earthquake that struck central Italy Wednesday has killed at least 120 people, officials say 150 people are still missing.
- Donald Trump's campaign paid a Barnes & Noble $55,055 to buy more than 3,500 hardcover copies of his book.
- Scientists found a planet "on our doorstep" that may be habitable. We could send robots to explore it in a century or so 🌍🌠