"I need it, I need my inhaler now!" Something I would end up saying way too often. It all started four years ago. I had just started university. Just like any other teenager, I was excited to move out from home and explore the world. My health was okay in general at that point. Just a few hiccups here and there in terms of other health conditions but my asthma was never something I had to worry about. I was good at taking my brown inhaler (beclometasone) every night and I rarely had to take my blue inhaler (salbutamol) unless I had run for an hour. Okay maybe ten minutes but I can dream. On the grand scale of things, I was doing well.
Not long later, things started to change. I was finding it difficult to do every day activities and I didn't feel quite right. I was constantly tired and needing my blue inhaler. When my GP would check my peak flow, the numbers kept going down. Don't get me wrong, I'm not fit in any way shape or form nor am I particularly healthy but my lifestyle hadn't changed. I was eating healthier if anything. I was stressed though. I found it difficult to make friends and I didn't really feel like I fit in anywhere and that did make me feel rather miserable for a while. To this day I still wonder whether that was a key factor that made my condition worse.
I was lucky, I had great doctors. Whenever I was having an issue with my asthma I could call in and get an appointment on the day. I would get calls on the weekends just to check I was okay. I had emergency outpatient appointments made when they were concerned about my health. They really did go the extra mile and for that I couldn't be more grateful. I went from being on the brown inhaler once a day to then taking it twice a day. That didn't work so they suggested I use tablets on the side. That still didn't help. I moved onto the purple inhaler (seretide). Again, there was no improvement.
My symptoms were bad. I wasn't sleeping properly. I was having to use my inhaler 4-5 times a day and I was constantly waking up in the middle of the night unable to breath. I was scared. Terrified. Every time I left the house I made sure to have a few blue inhalers on me. My boyfriend was so worried he even carried one on him too. Worried I would have another asthma attack. Worried that I may not get through the next one. Worried I would stop breathing all together. You may be thinking "asthma isn't a big deal" or "you can't die from it". I've heard that many times. From people who have absolutely no idea what it’s like. If you were to say to me years ago that my asthma could manifest to this, I wouldn't believe you either. I took it for granted.
3am. *Wheeze*. It felt like a 20kg suitcase was dumped onto my chest. I couldn't breath in. My eyes shot open wide and I panicked. Tears streaming down my face while I fumbled around for my inhaler. Slowly it felt like the belt strapped around my chest was slowly being loosened. Bit by bit. Being able to breath in that deep breath again was the most calming moment. That's how it was every night. The lack of sleep and constant anxiety just made the condition worse and if anything it was just a dangerous loop. What hit me hard was seeing the people around me suffer because of it. Seeing them worry and becoming anxious. I felt like a burden.
I was on and off strong steroids which were not having the impact I needed. It went from big temporary bursts of taking the tablets to using them long term. A move I was so reluctant to take because the side effects can be horrendous but I felt like I had no choice. By this point the doctors were desperate. I was desperate. I was referred to a specialist. After many tests it was clear I had eosinophilic asthma and the only way for me to get better was to lower the levels of eosinophils. They were then able to attribute my asthma to my many allergies which was constantly being triggered. It felt like a weight had been lifted. I knew what was going on with me finally and now something could be done about it.
I started a new inhaler (Relvar) from which I saw improvements with just a week after using it. I felt revitalised. I felt like a new person. I slept a whole night without waking up once due to my asthma. Having struggled so much for the past 3 years it finally felt like things were starting to look up. I was able to relax. My boyfriend was able to relax. My parents didn't have to worry so much about what was going on. I'm still getting treatment now but I've progressed so much to a point where I'm just so happy that my health is where it is. It is thanks to those doctors that I am alive today. As dramatic as that sounds, it's true. I'm a person that hates going to the GP and asking for help with my health. I've always just thought I could handle it. But I really couldn't.
There are 3 categories of asthma and what I have is known as severe asthma. Approximately 250,000 people (according to asthma.org.uk) have severe asthma which is shockingly high. That’s 1 in 20 people who suffer from asthma. It worries me that there are so many people in this country who have most likely gone through or experienced much worse than I did with their asthma. One big issue I've come across is plain ignorance. Many people have just assumed that I'm exaggerating my symptoms or that I'm looking for sympathy. Many people have said "it's only asthma, it's not that bad". It is "only asthma" but it can kill me. It can kill many others.
"Every 10 seconds someone is having a potentially life-threatening asthma attack in the UK. Every day, the lives of three families are devastated by the death of a loved one to an asthma attack, and tragically two thirds of these deaths are preventable" asthma.org.uk
To find out more information on how to help someone you know with asthma or even yourself, simply ask your GP or check out information online from sites like asthma.org.uk.
asthma.org.uk
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