1. The Summer House Season 1 Cast
2. Who knew The Hamptons could also be known as “Your mom’s friend who wears pearls”?
3. Is this just going to be a boozy mess?
4. Probably
5. As Stassi said best, why is there house so big?
6. Kyle seems like quite the charmer
7. The intro montage reminds me of The Hills meets The City
8. Kyle and Stassi were so close to having a moment in the hot tub… until Kyle forgot her name
9. Stassi is throwing all the shade in this hot tub right now
10. Maybe Kyle’s next move shouldn’t have been to point out her turtleneck and say she looked like Steve Jobs
11. Good to know Steve Jobs is one of your idols Kyle.
12. What does it mean to even like recently single people, Kyle?
13. “The only way it could be worse if you were like a serial killer” - Stassi
14. Seems like a swing and a miss Kyle
15. Kyle’s comment on Stassi’s nipple? Too much
16. Kyle realizing he may have had too much to drink? Priceless
17. Rosé pong? Who can afford that?
I mean obviously them
18. Kyle’s posing is too much
19. The Wirkus twins have a great analysis of Kyle
...including that there's moe than just the abs
20. Stephen late to the party on the Steve Jobs reference
21. And Stassi’s responding glare
22. Kyle seems to be really good at putting his foot in his mouth
23. Stephen describing Drunk Kyle as “a Ken doll doing tai chi underwater” is way too accurate
24. These hangovers look miserable before they’re even asleep
25. How do they even manage to go to work?
26. Night and day transformations with these people wow
27. “Half my social media feed is Coachella, Burning Man and then the other half is baby after baby, wedding after wedding and I’m somewhere in between.” - Lauren
PREACH
28. That margarita machine though...
29. This car ride between Lauren and Carl
30. Wow the story about the clogged toilets in your summer house definitely makes for great conversation
31. Stephen agreeing Carl is a player so early in the summer seems like a bold move
32. Kyle having a guilty conscience of juggling multiple women? There might be promise for him yet
33. Sister-sister chat between the Wirkuss twins could be its own show
34. It could be called Wirkus Circus, after the nickname Everett gave them
35. 2 months and getting married? WHAT
Seems promising
36. "Perfect storm of big personalities and crazy people" - Cristina
At least no one can say you didn't know what you were getting into
37. A TICK PIC
38. DEAD
39. How did Carl survive drinking a bottle of rosé the size of a small child?
The world may never know
40. Summer social goals? Go
41. I'm surprised everyone didn't say find Lauren a man
42. Steven’s judgmental comments about summer goals is LIFE
43. Kyle and Carl invented a word, Broment.
GOOD
44. How long did it take them to realize Carl was missing from the bar?
45. Omg they are so loud in the kitchen
46. Breaking up with someone just so you're not cuffed during the summer? Classy, Kyle
47. They are surprisingly pale for having a house in Montauk
48. This tension between Cristina and Lindsay is too much
49. “Her job is literally to spread gossip”
Then why are you friends with her?
50. Lindsay and Everett vom
51. Curious if Cristina and Steven ended up playing their drinking game?
52. And if so how many drinks did they have?
53. "Ugh that was a Ferrari"
Sure it was Kyle...
54. "I stare because I care"
Did you steal that from Monsters Inc., Carl?
55. At least Carl isn't subtle about his flirting
56. He's really going for it now
French Toast and all
57. This shopping trip now
58. I feel bad for the odd Wirkus twin out
59. How is possible that Lindsay and Cristina spend so much time together?
It's like they're dating
60. Back to the club (where only good things happen)
61. Now Steven is telling Ashley that Carl is a good guy?
Quick turn-around