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65 Thoughts I Had While Watching The Premiere Of Summer House

Bravo's new show that follows a group of twenty and thirty somethings seems like a boozy, fun mess.

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2. Who knew The Hamptons could also be known as “Your mom’s friend who wears pearls”?

8. Kyle and Stassi were so close to having a moment in the hot tub… until Kyle forgot her name

10. Maybe Kyle’s next move shouldn’t have been to point out her turtleneck and say she looked like Steve Jobs

12. What does it mean to even like recently single people, Kyle?

13. “The only way it could be worse if you were like a serial killer” - Stassi

16. Kyle realizing he may have had too much to drink? Priceless

19. The Wirkus twins have a great analysis of Kyle

...including that there's moe than just the abs

22. Kyle seems to be really good at putting his foot in his mouth

23. Stephen describing Drunk Kyle as “a Ken doll doing tai chi underwater” is way too accurate

24. These hangovers look miserable before they’re even asleep

27. “Half my social media feed is Coachella, Burning Man and then the other half is baby after baby, wedding after wedding and I’m somewhere in between.” - Lauren

PREACH

30. Wow the story about the clogged toilets in your summer house definitely makes for great conversation

31. Stephen agreeing Carl is a player so early in the summer seems like a bold move

32. Kyle having a guilty conscience of juggling multiple women? There might be promise for him yet

34. It could be called Wirkus Circus, after the nickname Everett gave them

36. "Perfect storm of big personalities and crazy people" - Cristina

At least no one can say you didn't know what you were getting into

39. How did Carl survive drinking a bottle of rosé the size of a small child?

The world may never know

44. How long did it take them to realize Carl was missing from the bar?

46. Breaking up with someone just so you're not cuffed during the summer? Classy, Kyle

49. “Her job is literally to spread gossip”

Then why are you friends with her?

51. Curious if Cristina and Steven ended up playing their drinking game?

54. "I stare because I care"

Did you steal that from Monsters Inc., Carl?

59. How is possible that Lindsay and Cristina spend so much time together?

It's like they're dating

61. Now Steven is telling Ashley that Carl is a good guy?

Quick turn-around

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