Remember the song "One Week"? The mostly harmless and catchy Barenaked Ladies song from 1998?
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Well, Reddit user Euchrid_Eucrow gave it another listen, and found a message hidden within the "infuriatingly cheery earworm." Let's take a look at the lyrics:
It's been one week since you looked at me
Cocked your head to the side and said "I'm angry"
Five days since you laughed at me saying
"Get that together, come back and see me"
Nothing too crazy yet...the opening lines tell the story of a couple fighting. They split up, and the girlfriend tells the boyfriend to only come back once he gets his life in order.
Three days since the living room
I realized it's all my fault, but couldn't tell you
Two days after he leaves, he comes back. Something, some incident he's afraid to even directly address, happens in the living room. He feels a tremendous amount of guilt and a sense of isolation because of what happened.
Bear with me here: Three days ago, in a fit of rage, he beat his girlfriend to death with a golf club.
Yesterday you'd forgiven me
but it'll still be two days till I say I'm sorry
Days after the incident, he's still locked in their apartment with her body. He hasn't had anything to eat or drink in that time.
Euchrid_Eucrow: "He imagined her saying that everything would be fine and their fighting and breakup weren't his fault. He also believes that in two days time, Monday morning, someone will notice her missing and call the police. He'll be sorry when they show up."
The rap verses are the first-person stream of consciousness ramblings of a man on the edge of madness, who is slowly starving and obsessing about food, but who is unable to eat because of his overwhelming guilt.
I'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral
Can't understand what I mean?
Well, you soon will
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve
I have a history of taking off my shirt
These lines reveal the whole plot.
Euchrid_Eucrow: "'Can't understand what I mean, well you soon will' is one of the most sinister lines in all of pop music. He is referring to her own imminent funeral."
Hold onto the line about the shirt. We'll get back to that in a moment.
It's been one week since you looked at me
Threw your arms in the air
and said "You're crazy"
Five days since you tackled me
I've still got the rug burns on both my knees
The man keeps replaying the incident over and over again in his head. He's beginning to panic, thinking of all the ways we could claim he killed her out of self-defense.
It's been three days since the afternoon
You realized it's not my fault
not a moment too soon
Yesterday you'd forgiven me
And now I sit back and wait till you say you're sorry
Euchrid_Eucrow: "Our man is bargaining with her now, who is actually himself. If she'd just apologize, it will all be fine and it can all go back to normal."
Another ranting rap verse as he goes mad, except for one moment of clarity:
Gonna get a set a' better clubs
Gonna find the kind with tiny nubs
Just so my irons aren't always flying off the back-swing
The murder weapon. He realizes that the blood-stained golf club he used to beat her to death needs to be disposed of and replaced. A missing club would be suspicious.
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve
I have a history of losing my shirt
He continues to plan the cover-up of her murder. He begins to worry about the blood-stained shirt he killed her in. He knows he needs to "lose" it before the police show up looking for his girlfriend.
It's been one week since you looked at me
Dropped your arms to your sides
and said "I'm sorry"
Five days since I laughed at you and said,
"You just did just what I thought you were gonna do"
Three days since the living room
We realized we're both to blame,
but what could we do?
Yesterday you just smiled at me
'Cause it'll still be two days till we say we're sorry
Euchrid_Eucrow: "He has come to realise that perhaps they both had valid points in their arguments after all, and that both are to blame for the disintegration of their relationship."
At the end, he finally comes to terms with what he's done. He admits his crime to himself, and accepts the idea that he will be caught and persecuted for his crime.
Birchmount Stadium, home of the Robbie
When the police come for him, he'll reveal exactly where he buried the body.
