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we all suck so you're doomed to be disappointed no matter which bitchass you get sry

Which Bitchass Are You?

Which alter-ego do you identify with the most?

How would you resolve a conflict between you and one of your fellow bitchasses?

What size birb are you?

What is your favorite meal @ stu?

Which of these dumb ass things would you do?

What do u look for in a boi?

What is your best trait?

What is your worst trait?

What do you usually wear on a regular basis?

Which of these things would you say?

Can fuck all of Newton campus and emotionally not feel anything. Occasionally has to be cockblocked by a little asian girl because she doesn't think about consequences. Whitest Indian girl you will ever meet. Always in need of a bowl or grinder, but will be the greatest doctor you will ever meet if she can even stay on the pre-med track. The scars on her knees are a symbol of how passionately she sucks dick.

Avni "DONT FUCKING CALL ME AVANI" Amin

If you say she lives in Long Island instead of "on", expect to be cut open in your sleep and have Fireball poured all over your raw organs. Most people like big cocks, but she prefers big ears. If you like the same guy as her, she will intimidate you out of it. 50% love, 50% pure aggression. Rage as fiery as her hair.

Emma "you're a fucking psychopath" Garry

You'll call Alana pretty and she will start BAWLING. She's has to be forced to not spread her mono all over campus. Also, forget about having a crush! Dat boi is probably already in love with Alana because she's a goddamn flirt and will twirl her hair while making eye contact with you and not even realize. She will also refuse to accept being wrong. This girl can fight to the death, but this strength is one of her great qualities that makes everyone love her. (but don't tell her you love her she will start to cry).

Alana "a Chinese" MacLeod

Whenever people talk about her they will say one of two things: 1) "Maggie is so cute!!!" or 2) "Who is Maggie?". Most of her friends are from long island so she likes to tell people she's from there too. She loves when your nose blood gets all over my face when you hook up with her! If you want to see pictures of Chris Chilton in his prime go over to her humble abode in Winchester, MA and she'll whip out dem elementary school yearbooks.

Maggie "has known Chris Chilton since elementary school" Splaine

She is a professional dancer and choreographer. she can dab, mini dab, backwards dab, finger dab, alana dab, dab dab, double dab, triple dab, dab dab dAB DAB DAB DAB DABD BA DABDABDABD ABD!!!!!

Julia "floor bitch" McDonald

FRAN buckley is NOT a new yorker. She lives in bumblefuck new york. SO DON'T LISTEN TO HER WHEN SHE SAYS SHE'S FROM NEW YORK. Also, she will not speak to you if you voted for Trump. She can explain how the electoral college works in detail until attacked by a varsity fencer. Only uses the back stairwell. Let's hope the RA's don't start using it for rounds!

Fran "casual lunch date" Buckley

Doesn't go out on thursdays because she doesn't have a GODDAMN FAKE. You probably think she likes you but she's actually roasting you behind your back. She'll never let you forget that Luca has a basketball game and her bakery will spell your name wrong on your birthday cake. Spent the first 3 weeks of school by herself and still doesn't know how to do her own laundry.

Fran "Jesus is in the mafia" Pellegrini

Has been spotted on Newton probably twice so far. She's usually super busy with tennis and whatever else Anne Maries do. Will get drunk after 2 shots and wants to leave the party after approximately 30 minutes. And she hates when the Stu dining staff doesn't give her enough vegetables. P.S. DO NOT CALL HER ANNE

Anne Marie "cannonball" Green

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Which Bitchass Are You?

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