There is a whole lot of food at the Houston Rodeo. A haven for some, a nightmare for others, here is everything you can eat at the world’s largest rodeo.
1. Pretty much any deep-fried food you could possibly think of.
Like fried red velvet cake.
2. Fried cheesecake, anyone?
What about Twinkies? Reese’s?
3. Or what about a deep-fried “Snicker”?
Yeah just one snicker, because more than one deep-fried Snickers bar will surely lead to death.
4. Honestly, cookie dough is probably the most logical food to deep fry.
But wait, there’s more.
5. How about a deep-fried Pop Tart?
To be honest, it really just tastes like a whole lot of dough.
6. Or Oreo?
The Oreos were pretty damn good. Too good.
- hides in shame *
And then there’s the crème de la crème of deep-fried foods….
7. A beautiful, giant, sent-from-heaven glob of deep-fried Nutella.
No one knows how they do it, but frankly no one cares. GET IN MY BELLY.
8. And if that still wasn’t enough for you, why not wash it down with a fried moon pie?
9. There are also non-fried foods, like GIANT cinnamon rolls.
Fly to Texas and eat this immediately.
10. And giant floating corn dogs?
Did you really expect there to NOT be a giant floating corn dog?
The corn dogs, up close and personal.
Slightly more approachable than the floating variety.
PIZZA SHACK ALERT!
Official alert: behold The Pizza Shack the giver of life, cheesy goodness, and severely clogged arteries.
11. But who cares about arteries when there are volcano nachos!
12. GIANT PIZZA.
Oh wait… “pizza shown is NOT actual size!”
You win this time, Pizza Shack.
13. Corn Shack > Pizza Shack.
14. Hey look! Big old bags of popcorn that need consuming.
And look you can get HOT cheese as a topping. PTL.
15. And now for the good stuff… MEAT, aka steak.
Not of any particular variety, just steak apparently.
16. Wow, bacon-wrapped turkey legs.
17. Also, Texas-sized turkey legs.
In case the bacon-wrapped wasn’t enough for you.
18. Chicken-fried bacon.
Wait so is it chicken, fried like bacon? Or bacon in the style of chicken?
19. Brisket baked potato.
More meat = more better.
20. Half-pound burgers, jumbo corn dogs, and giant western sausages.
So I guess their motif is… big food?
21. Jumbo butterflied, fried shrimp.
That’s a lot of adjectives for one shrimp.
22. And finally, the side dishes. I give you cowboy potatoes.
Hey there, spud.
23. Fried green tomatoes, Texas toothpicks, hushpuppy baskets.
What exactly is a Texas toothpick do you think?
24. And many types of pickles and pickled goods.
Famous pickle dog, pickle chips, tequila pickle poppers, and beer-battered onion rings. You know, just to mix things up a bit.
25. But most importantly, remember everything tastes better with beer.
Amen, the end.
P.S. If you need some hand sanitizer after all that food, it’s located in between the Hershey’s syrup bottles.
Happy eating, y’all.
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