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What Will Be Your Bacchanal Story?

Check yourself before you wreck yourself!

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  1. What time do you start pregaming?

    Bacchanal is a marathon, not a sprint.

    6 am
    8 am
    10 am
    12 pm
    I've already started
    There is no pregame -- only game
  2. Where's the pregame?

    Brownstones
    Brownstones
    EC
    EC
    Cute suitemate bonding
    Cute suitemate bonding
    Rooftop party
    Rooftop party
    NoCo
    NoCo
    Boozy brunch
    Boozy brunch
  3. What are you drinking?

    Vodka
    Vodka
    Beer
    Beer
    Tequila
    Tequila
    Jungle Juice
    Jungle Juice
    An amalgamation of everything
    An amalgamation of everything
    Fine wine
    Fine wine
  4. Choose a spot to throw up:

    Toilet
    Toilet
    Alma Mater
    Alma Mater
    Butler Roof
    Butler Roof
    Pupin bathroom (you forgot to hand in your pset)
    Pupin bathroom (you forgot to hand in your pset)
    Carman Elevator
    Carman Elevator
    On the artist
    On the artist
  5. Who will you hook up with?

    Your SO because you're taken
    Your SO because you're taken
    Your old fuck buddy
    Your old fuck buddy
    Random frat boy
    Random frat boy
    The annoying kid in your CC class
    The annoying kid in your CC class
    The friend you swear is like a sibling to you
    The friend you swear is like a sibling to you
    Anyone and anything
    Anyone and anything
  6. Choose an old friend to smoke with

    Old lit hum squad
    Old lit hum squad
    Your ex
    Your ex
    Your Econ TA
    Your Econ TA
    NSOP bff
    NSOP bff
    Public safety
    Public safety
    Just yourself-- not tryna share
    Just yourself-- not tryna share
  7. Pick a drunchie

    Bagels
    Bagels
    JJ's
    JJ's
    No food -- only drank
    No food -- only drank
    halal
    halal
    Westside salad
    Westside salad
    Koronets
    Koronets
  8. Choose a random thing to do on bacchanal

    Submit a job application
    Submit a job application
    Dance on the top of the fountain in the middle of the concert
    Dance on the top of the fountain in the middle of the concert
    Call your grandma to wish her happy birthday (it's not her birthday)
    Call your grandma to wish her happy birthday (it's not her birthday)
    Workout at Dodge
    Workout at Dodge
    Play ding-dong ditch at Prezbo's mansion
    Play ding-dong ditch at Prezbo's mansion
    Adopt a highway
    Adopt a highway
  9. What are you doing at night?

    Mel's
    EC
    Frats
    Going downtown
    Didn't make it out
    1020

What Will Be Your Bacchanal Story?

You got: You'll hook up with the artist

You were dancing, they were singing. They spotted you in the crowd, had their security guard usher you to a black van, and drive you to their hotel downtown. You went willingly and excitedly. You hook up, and you come back and tell anyone who will listen -- this is not fake news, people!! Forget AlunaGeorge, you're the new headliner. Congrats on literally doing the most -- thaz some wild shit.

You'll hook up with the artist
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You got: You'll get CAVA'd and wake up at St. Luke's

You left all of your friends after the concert because you were craving some koronets and were convinced you could make it yourself. You stumble around for a while but once you get there you make it a point to tell each person individually how much you love pizza and insist that they split a slice with you. When you drop your order on the floor you started crying, pass out, pee your pants, and wind up in St. Luke's. You don't remember any of this, of course. The concerned guy who cava'd you was kind enough to stick around you tell you how embarrassing you were as soon as you woke up.

You'll get CAVA'd and wake up at St. Luke's
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You got: You're going to have a turn down bacchanal

You were sober the whole day. You probably just wanted to have some lighthearted fun with your friends, or maybe you're *that person* who listened to the concert from Butler ref room. Either way, you didn't get trashed, so you pretty much failed bacchanal. But hey, least you got a chance to get ahead on some CC reading and *finally* finished the last season of Friends!

You're going to have a turn down bacchanal
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You got: You'll end up stuck in an EC shaft

Drinking is all good and fun, but you thought it'd be interesting to spice things up. Maybe it'd be exciting to try an edible for the first time. But you got destroyed. In fact, so destroyed that your crossed ass somehow managed to find its way to the EC roof, open the vent, and fall from the 23rd floor all the way to the 16th floor. You were stuck for eight hours, but at least you had the oreos you stole from some random suite you broke into to sustain you.

You'll end up stuck in an EC shaft
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You got: You're going to win bacchanal

You planned this shit well. You drank at the right pace and were at just the right level of lit. You went ham throwing colors and holi, danced your butt off to some AlunaGeorge (whose lastest album you very diligently listened to the entire week leading up to bacch to build hype), hooked up with a cutie on the basketball team, and went out for beers with your friends after a refreshing post-concert nap. 10/10.

You're going to win bacchanal
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You got: You're going to party like a rockstar

Oh shit! Someone played Broccoli at the pregame and you just couldn't resist jumping on the table and jamming out like you were DRAM himself. So obviously it would be a great idea to also jump on stage at the actual concert and release your inner rock star, right? Wrong. You get kicked out of the concert and get escorted back to your room, but that's okay. You rally all of your friends to Mel's that night and continue the party there!

You're going to party like a rockstar
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