1. Calling someone up without giving yourself a 15 minute pep talk first.
That’s not a thing.
2. Enjoying surprise parties.
7. And then sleeping straight through the night, undisturbed by the ghosts of fuck-ups past.
WHAT ABOUT WAKING UP AT TWO IN THE MORNING TORTURED BY THE MEMORY OF THAT TIME YOU SAID, “THANKS, YOU TOO,” TO THE HOSTESS WHO TOLD YOU TO ENJOY YOUR MEAL WHEN YOU WERE THIRTEEN???
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