1. First things first: This couture season was really about Naomi Campbell.
Yes — SHE WALKED DOWN THE RUNWAY TWICE.
2. First when she opened Versace.
3. And then when she closed Versace!
Fashion people were like:
4. Because Naomi on a runway is just that exciting, here’s a photo of her foot.
The word you’re looking for is “fierce.”
5. Uma Thurman went to the show thinking she’d be the most famous person there.
Which she wasn’t, as we’ve established.
6. Fortunately Donatella Versace was there wearing this spectacular suit to calm everyone down.
So get ahold of yourself because we’ve got lots more couture fabulousness to go here.
7. Moving on: Check out this incredible body stocking with oversized chains instead of a legit bra!
Insanely awesome fashion, is what that is.
8. The shiny Versace bodysuits don’t stop there.
J. Lo can’t wait to put one on and do this.
9. Other looks in the Versace show were designed to look like they were falling off the models, as though being seductively removed by an invisible lover.
Xtina’s all about it.
Who wouldn’t be?
10. Moving on: Lace pants made an appearance at the On Aura Tout Vu show.
11. On Aura Tout Vu also showed these couture visors.
You don’t often see something as pedestrian as clear visors on the couture runways.
So, it’s hard to know what to think.
12. On the other hand, no one can argue with a beaded bodysuit.
On Aura Tout Vu again.
13. Or headpieces like this.
On Aura Tout Vu.
14. And this wedding dress was pretty awesome.
On Aura Tout Vu.
Because you just know it’s for a bride who gets ready to walk down the aisle thinking:
15. Next show! Models in the Rami Al Ali show looked like they were judging everyone.
16. You would too if you were wearing couture in the presence of people who weren’t.
17. The house of Schiaparelli was revived by Christian Lacroix, which meant models got to wear these fabulous pink poufs on their heads.
18. And black poufs on their feet.
19. The guy against the wall on the left tried to bat at the poufs like a cat.
As you would.
20. The nerdy practice of taking iPad pix at shows continued at the Stephane Rolland show.
21. The dramatic white capes did look quite stunning from afar.
22. Anna Wintour arrived to the Chanel couture show with a big grin on her face, while daughter Bee was like, “SCOWL.”
Total Freaky Friday moment.
23. French President Francois Hollande’s girlfriend also went to the Chanel couture show.
When this happens in France, the people are like:
Just imagine the outrage here if Michelle Obama went to fashion week.
24. Joan Smalls walked in the show.
Black models hardly ever walk Chanel shows. Finally Karl Lagerfeld is waking up and smelling his smelling salts.
For the record, Karl says stuff like this all the time.
So he probably wouldn’t think it’s a problem to go years without hiring a black runway model.
25. As for the collection itself, it included these square hats, which were kind of cool and interesting.
Not quite as cool as this penguin, but hey, what is?
26. The set for the Chanel show was this cityscape on a stage.
Karl loves a good scape.
27. After the show, Karl came out and did a little jig in front of his backup dancers — er, models.
28. Erin Wasson was like LOL.
29. And then she was like, “MY TURN.”
FYI Getty Images captioned this photo: “A model shows her muscles…”
Beyoncé didn’t want to say anything, but…
It’s just that she knows how to work a stage better than anyone.
30. Oh and Rihanna was there to diva up the place.
She wore your grandma’s fave cardigan, possibly also underwear.
31. But probably the *most* major show of couture is Dior.
Designer Raf Simons, after dismissing model Jourdan Dunn from the cast for being too busty, hired a few black models after all, which is great because Dior is another show that’s consistently, boringly, politically incorrectly white.
32. Alek Wek, Grace Mahary, Joan Smalls, Maria Borges, Kelly Moreira, and Yasmin Warsame all walked in the show.
According to Jezebel, they’re the first black models to be hired by Dior since Simons took over the label from John Galliano.
Naturally, this led to reviews headlined things like, “Dior Couture: A Chorus of Multicultural Notes.”
33. Anna Dello Russo went to the show wearing Balenciaga.
She was probably (justifiably) thinking:
34. So hey anyway, how about this couture Dior nipple tape.
35. And this striped dress that looks like it was made of that stuff you put under carpets so they don’t slide around on your wood floors.
36. Some of the striped looks were pretty cool.
Let’s just not talk about the gloves, though.
His floral dresses were just unbelievably beautiful and wonderful. Girls everywhere are like:
38. The whole show was really just so, so lovely.
It’s people like Mr. Valli who consistently remind us all that couture is unquestionably the best.
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