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27 New Rules For Dressing From London

London Fashion Week is known for being wacky in the most awesome way. Let's see what tips those Brits have for dressing next spring.

1. Underboob is the new sideboob.

Pairs best with shorts that have a matching chiffon overlay.This look is by a label called, quite perfectly, "MAN." Can I just say what a pity it is that the images are only easily viewable on NowFashion.com? I mean...
Via nowfashion.com

Pairs best with shorts that have a matching chiffon overlay.

This look is by a label called, quite perfectly, "MAN." Can I just say what a pity it is that the images are only easily viewable on NowFashion.com? I mean...

2. The pattern on your socks should match the pattern on your track suit.

Another look by MAN. But this wasn't the finale...

Another look by MAN. But this wasn't the finale...

3. Men need cat tees.

Just like women.Another rule from here: sheer blouses can be tied around the waist.

Just like women.

Another rule from here: sheer blouses can be tied around the waist.

4. Draw all over your face.

And your metallic bra.Tip via Louise Goldin.
Stuart Wilson / Getty Images

And your metallic bra.

Tip via Louise Goldin.

5. Wear opaque glasses, but cut slits in them so you can see a little bit.

Another suggestion from Louise Goldin's runway.
Stuart Wilson / Getty Images

Another suggestion from Louise Goldin's runway.

6. Wear clear glasses but paint your face a non-flesh color, like mustard.

Add a gray grannie wig for extra drama.(Tip via Vivienne Westwood.)
Gareth Cattermole / Getty Images

Add a gray grannie wig for extra drama.

(Tip via Vivienne Westwood.)

7. Wear your pearls asymmetrically.

So you don't look like an uptight square.Also from Westwood's runway.
Gareth Cattermole / Getty Images

So you don't look like an uptight square.

Also from Westwood's runway.

8. Wear hats that look like a combination of a badminton birdie, umbrella, and a hipster's hair.

From the Giles show.
Ian Gavan / Getty Images

From the Giles show.

Seeing where you're going is so last season.
Ian Gavan / Getty Images

Seeing where you're going is so last season.

9. Wear fascinators that look like a Saran Wrap sphere for your head.

Also from the Giles show.
Ian Gavan / Getty Images

Also from the Giles show.

10. Look like a walking car crash.

Also by Giles.
Ian Gavan / Getty Images

Also by Giles.

11. Wear python inset with yellow pastel, but only on the armpits.

I guess this sort of dress is what they call ugly beauty.Look by Erdem.
Tim Whitby / Getty Images

I guess this sort of dress is what they call ugly beauty.

Look by Erdem.

12. Make like Kate Middleton Getting Married, and wear lace sleeves.

But unlike her, you can be sexy about it!Also from Erdem.
Tim Whitby / Getty Images

But unlike her, you can be sexy about it!

Also from Erdem.

13. Carry your matching fanny pack on your shoulder.

See, it's not fanny packs that are the faux pas — it's wearing them like a belt that's the problem.Tip via Mark Fast.
Tim Whitby / Getty Images

See, it's not fanny packs that are the faux pas — it's wearing them like a belt that's the problem.

Tip via Mark Fast.

14. Cover a perfectly sexy vest with a perfectly un-sexy cape.

I don't know why you never thought to hit the town dressed like Batman before, guys.By Mark Fast.
Tim Whitby / Getty Images

I don't know why you never thought to hit the town dressed like Batman before, guys.

By Mark Fast.

15. Turn stamps into clothes.

The work of Mary Katranzou, whose show looked quite beautiful:
Stuart Wilson / Getty Images

The work of Mary Katranzou, whose show looked quite beautiful:

Stuart Wilson / Getty Images

16. Accent dresses with random pieces of duct tape.

Now here's a technique that's easy to DIY.Via Christopher Kane.
Suzanne Plunkett / Reuters

Now here's a technique that's easy to DIY.

Via Christopher Kane.

Plain doilies are for losers.
Tim Whitby / Getty Images

Plain doilies are for losers.

17. Wear a face that is going to freak out whoever you're talking to.

Also by Christopher Kane.
Tim Whitby / Getty Images

Also by Christopher Kane.

By Fyordor Golan.

By Fyordor Golan.

18. If you're a man, wear metallic purple jackets.

But not if you're a woman — this look is way too masculine.By Burberry.
Ian Gavan / Getty Images

But not if you're a woman — this look is way too masculine.

By Burberry.

19. Use seams to make your breasts abundantly clear.

I think this is what every cleavage-obsessed Real Housewife is missing in the winter months — a breasty skirt suit that keeps the chill out.Also by Burberry.
Ian Gavan / Getty Images

I think this is what every cleavage-obsessed Real Housewife is missing in the winter months — a breasty skirt suit that keeps the chill out.

Also by Burberry.

20. Make sure your leather jacket has room for two.

Also make sure your pants take a day off here and there.Via Burberry.
Ian Gavan / Getty Images

Also make sure your pants take a day off here and there.

Via Burberry.

21. Dress your poodle in a matching designer vest.

You wouldn't want him to be seen in something from, like, PetsMart. (LOL!)Look by Mulberry.

You wouldn't want him to be seen in something from, like, PetsMart. (LOL!)

Look by Mulberry.

22. Look vaguely medieval.

Also isn't the waist the best place for a ruffle? Widens it riiiight up for you.
Getty Images

Also isn't the waist the best place for a ruffle? Widens it riiiight up for you.

23. Wear pointless nouns on your chest.

By Acne.
Getty Images

By Acne.

24. Wear pointless adjectives on your chest.

You can't see it because of her hair, but this tee says "Bitchin'."Also by House of Holland.
style.com

You can't see it because of her hair, but this tee says "Bitchin'."

Also by House of Holland.

25. Wear beautifully colored overalls.

Please, don't forget the Peter Pan collar underneath.By House of Holland.

Please, don't forget the Peter Pan collar underneath.

By House of Holland.

26. Layer your straw hats.

Don't be the fool that goes out in just one at a time.Another look by Acne.

Don't be the fool that goes out in just one at a time.

Another look by Acne.

27. Make people wonder if your hat is more phallic or nipple-like.

By Fyordor Golan.

By Fyordor Golan.

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