Style

22 New Fashion Rules For Wedding Dresses

Did you know that everyone wants you to look like Kate Middleton? And that Vera Wang would dress you in black?

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5. Make sure your parasol-veil has extra fabric in the back in case your dress happens to be see-through.

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No one wants to show their underwear on their wedding day.

(Reem Acra.)

6. If you don't want a traditional veil and are also weirdly not interested in a veil attached to an umbrella, be sure to wear something interesting on your head.

13. Color-block your boobs.

Fernanda Calfat / Getty Images

Only Vera Wang can get away with black for bridal — because everyone will go apeshit over whatever she puts in stores no matter what the runway stuff looks like.

16. Or look like you're wearing a harness.

Fernanda Calfat / Getty Images

Nothing says holy matrimony like a harness, but who really needs the leather straps? That's where this dress comes in.

(Vera Wang.)

19. Actually, don't wear anything fussy at all and just opt for a shift and matching coat that makes you look like a mom at church.

21. You know, come to think of it, just wear a tank dress, because after all that, don't you just want to wear something astoundingly plain??

22. WHATEVER you wear, just make sure you blur out the flower girls in the photos so nothing takes away from the star attraction.