We usually hear from mothers what it's like to give birth. But have you ever wondered what the experience is like from the perspective of the other person often in the delivery room — the father?
Well, Reddit user u/Sakuramochi_Chan did. So they asked, "Men who were there with their partners in the delivery room, what was the experience like?". Here's what men had to say.
1. "I watched both my kids be born. It's a weird experience, let me tell you. It's bloody, gross, and intensely biological, but it's also one of the coolest things I've ever seen. There's surprisingly little blood but quite a lot of other bodily fluids. The human body is pretty amazing sometimes."
2. "My first-born was born on my birthday. My main memory is my exhausted wife turning to me after the baby was born and saying, 'Next year you get an ice cream cake.'"
—u/knockatize
3. "My wife was at one side of the dividing sheet chatting to the anesthesiologist like they're at a freakin' tea party. And the doctor doing the C-section is calling out to her, 'You might feel some pressure and movement here now' as they pull open the incision and pop the baby out like two football players pushing a basketball through a two-inch hole in a rubber sheet."
4. "My wife and I had a NICU baby. He arrived at around 30 weeks — after my wife spent 5 weeks in the hospital because her water broke at 25 weeks. He was four pounds with all of the wires and tubes hooked up to him. That day was an absolute rollercoaster of emotions."
5. "I was white as a ghost and scared for the first one. You would have thought I was holding an alien. Nothing prepares you for that. Second was more relaxed. I watched football on the TV, my wife pushed me away, and asked for her mom. I tried to help, but didn't get to do the ice chips and holding her hand. I cut the cord. First one to hold my son. Both births were amazing and memorable. I wouldn't change a thing."
6. "My wife had nine months building a gradually-increasing connection to the baby — carrying, little kicks, hiccups, and burps. But for me, all that happened in one exact moment when I heard my daughter cry for the first time.
"All emotions wrapped into one exact moment in time. For the mother, it's a nurturing build of love and connection. For the father, it's a bomb. I froze, I didn't respond when spoken to — and I cried. It was a big moment for me and all I have to do is close my eyes and I can recreate the sound of the first time I heard her voice, etched in my memory like a laser-engraved vinyl record."
7. "Today is my first born's birthday. 29 years ago today I still remember I grabbed him, I held him, I cut his cord — and he pissed on me. I thought, 'Now I'm a dad... I have to be better now.'"
8. "My daughter was born in July of this year. First child and she came seven weeks early. Wife woke me at 2 a.m. Saturday with what she thought were contractions. We went into hospital, they checked her, and told us they should pass — and we should go home. Got home by 7 a.m. but by a.m. she was definitely getting contractions and throwing up."
"At this point over 24 hours with no sleep or food for either of us as I didn't leave her side. Delivery took an hour. My daughter came out deathly grey and not breathing — and was placed on my wife for about 5 seconds while the midwife rubbed her trying to get her to breathe. She made me quickly cut her cord and then was handed over to doctors. At this point I was in complete shock just trying to focus on my wife and put a brave face on for her.
After a few minutes under heat lamps and being ventilated she was taken straight to NICU. They wanted my wife to rest so I kissed her goodbye told her how proud I was and went to NICU.
Seeing my daughter hooked up to all the machines broke me. Everything caught up to me and I had a panic attack, couldn't really understand what was happening, and was told to go sleep and come back after resting.
Got a few hours of sleep and went back to meet her properly. Turns out, there was no reason as to why she came early. The same day, she started breathing by herself, was in NICU for just under two weeks, and ha been home since. We did every test available not a thing they can find wrong with her. She's nearly 12 weeks old now, piling the weight on, and is a happy little baby. We named her Lyra."
—u/Grandfs
9. "Emergency C-section. Kid came out not breathing and heart not beating. Everything is happening so fast and everyone in the room knows what's going on except for me. 1/10, do not want to do that again."
—u/Rxton
10. "We were waiting in the delivery room and the baby was taking its time. Both my wife and I dosed off between contractions. Once I woke up with the doctor coming into the room. She went and measured various things, my wife still asleep. I asked, 'Everything all right?' And the doctor replied 'Yeah. Just checking. If you see a bunch of people coming in and barking orders at each other, pushing carts, then you can worry.'"
Of course an hour or so later, the doors bang open — and it's a bunch of people coming pushing carts and barking orders at each other. I tried to ask what was the problem and was told, in barking, to stay the fuck out of the way.
Turns out the baby was in distress. The doctor looked at some machines and decided to do a C-section. Wife's bed was wheeled into the OR, I was given a crash-course in scrubbing, and told to go in and sit in a chair by her head. There was a curtain at about her neck line, so neither of us could see what was going on. I felt excited, worried, afraid, all at the same time. I tried to put on a brave façade, but I knew she could read right through me so she kept making conversation to calm me down.
At some point she said she felt something really strange, and right after we heard the baby crying. Tears welled up in both our eyes, just like they are doing now in mine, 15 years later. She told me to keep the baby under my eyes at all times, for some reason she was terrified of the baby being switched.
So I wheeled my chair back and watched as they brought the screaming baby to a sink, cleaned him up, swaddled him and put a little cap on his head, at which point he fell asleep. Then they brought him to us and we got to say hello to our kid for the first time."
—u/wordserious
11. "I got to deliver my youngest son, believe it or not. It was one of the coolest experiences of my life."
12. "Possibly the most nerve-racking, emotionally-draining experience — and also the most excited I’ve ever been. The rush of love when you hold your new baby is amazing."
13. "It was fine, but hectic. You are there to provide support for your partner. Be calm and collected. Videotaping and taking pictures is only a secondary role and only if you have time. I had to catch the baby as it came out since the nurse and doctor were not in the room at the time."
14. "After hours of waiting, my wife said I should sleep. So I fell asleep and then woke up from a dead sleep to the birth starting. I stood on the side and I guess looked like I was going to pass out because the doctor immediately said I needed to sit. So I sat a minute and then got back into the fray. I held a leg while the baby came out. Then I held my baby for a moment and she got passed to my wife. After that, it's mostly a blur since the baby stage is a nightmare."
—u/urchisilver
15. "For some reason, when my wife was pushing, the nurses left. She started contracting again so I told her friend to grab one leg and I grabbed the other — and told her to push like the nurses did. The nurses came back and didn't interfere and I ended up helping her deliver our daughter."
—u/aoiv_tabs
16. "It was simultaneously horrifying and miraculous. The pain my wife went through and the amount of blood and amniotic fluid that was pushed out of her — it was astounding.
17. "My wife and daughter almost died. Major shoulder dystocia. Code pink. Violent emergency c-section. Witnessed successful resuscitation on my daughter. Mom needed a four-unit transfusion. I’m a paramedic and this still majorly fucked me up."
18. "I was right there when my daughter was born. I was the first person she saw. It was the best experience of my life."
19. "26 hours in labor. Two hours of my wife just pushing (while in agonizing pain) to get the baby out. I was a whole mess from hour 12 and on. So, I was basically miserable for the last 14 hours."
"I wasn’t mentally prepared. As soon as I saw him come out and he started crying, I erupted into tears like a baby myself. Most emotional moment of my entire existence. It was magical and I’m just glad I didn’t pass out before I could witness his birth."
20. "It was incredible, breathtaking, amazing, and terrifying. Being the first person my daughter saw and making eye contact with her when she came out was an out-of-body experience. I have a great picture from about three minutes after she was born where I’m holding her and we’re staring at each other and it looks like she’s sticking her tongue out at me."
21. "During the actual birth, especially with your first child, you experience almost every emotion simultaneously. Joy for the new addition, fear and worry that something will go wrong, pride for how amazing my wife is, helplessness for not being able to really help my wife more than say encouraging words or holding a leg. It's emotionally exhausting, all while on very little sleep. 10/10 cool experience, though."
—u/pikeben08