People Are Reliving The Times That They Ignored All Logic Or Sense, And It's Really Making Me Feel Better About Myself

    "Luckily the surgeon was able to reattach his two fingers."

    Benjamin Dzialdowski
    by Benjamin Dzialdowski

    BuzzFeed Staff

    In a recent post, we all had a good chuckle at people owning up to their stupidest moments. And, because sharing is caring, people decided to confess their own senseless stories in comments.

    Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures

    Here are 19 of the best (and worryingly relatable) responses!

    1. "I am writing this with three broken fingers because something got caught in the rotating bit of my cordless vacuum while I was using it and I tried to get it out... without turning it off."

    Paramount+ / TV Land

    —sarahed1990

    2. "When I was young, my dad asked me to pick up something for him in town shortly after I got my driving license. I hopped into his car which was in the garage, but the battery was flat."

    Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures

    "'No problem', I thought, being the smart straight A, top of my class teenager. 'I know what to do. I can jumpstart it outside.'

    I opened the driver-side door, let off the parking brake, and proceeded to push the car backwards out of the garage, forgetting that car + driver’s door was wider than the garage door.

    This resulted in the car's door being ripped off, and a father who was more disappointed in me than angry."

    —lastmangoinparis

    3. "My grandfather once decided he needed a circular table saw as it would make his project go a lot quicker."

    NBC

    "He waited until my grandmother had left and then clamped his chainsaw to his workbench. My mum got a phone call to take him to the hospital, luckily the surgeon was able to reattach his two fingers which had parted company with the rest of his hand."

    —kayblu02

    4. "I was playing with an air-soft pellet while laying on the floor sideways watching unsolved mysteries."

    NBC

    "For some stupid reason, I put the little ball in my ear. Right as I realised how stupid of an idea that was it just rolled right into my ear canal. I tried to get it out with my finger, which only made it worse."

    "I then put a 1HP Kirby vacuum to my ear, which subsequently blew my eardrum out with the ball still stuck inside. I went to the ER to get it out and the doctors and nurses were like 'oh we thought it would be a little kid'…. I was 16."

    —grimchbettahavemymoney

    5. "When I was six, I was slumming it on the top bunk one morning when my favourite stuffie tumbled off the side and fell to the floor."

    NBC

    "Going head first, I thought I could hang down holding on with my toes and reach it. I landed, face first, on the linoleum. I busted my lip open and cracked a tooth. Genius in the works."

    —jcnmbee43

    6. "My friend and I were running through a bunch of black curtains on a stage."

    BBC

    "We full speed ran into each other and my front tooth smashed into her forehead. Blood everywhere, partly from the cut on her forehead, but more from my front tooth turning 180 degrees in my mouth. And it was a permanent tooth as well!"

    —plzbediscreet

    7. "My childhood neighbour is the poster boy for why lawn darts got banned."

    20th Century Fox

    "He was playing with them, tossing them in the air, trying to catch the not-pointy end, and he failed. The metal point went all the way through his palm. I can’t say he’s THE reason, but the next year, they weren’t sold anymore."

    —judirothenberg

    8. "When I was like 10 I thought it would be a genius idea to stick my finger in a snow cone machine to get an ice cube out as it was slowing down."

    NBC

    "Long story short, I chopped off the top of my finger. My mom wasn’t home either so that was a fun surprise for her and my neighbours who I had to go to for help."

    —aberrantia

    9. "My dad and uncle worked in construction. One day my mum had to drop off something at the site and took us with her. I (aged eight) was wandering around the house that was under construction."

    NBC

    "Outside the front door, there were materials laying about that had been tossed out between building stages – broken bits of drywall, fibreglass, insulation, etc., including a 2x4 wooden wall with a couple of three-inch nails sticking out. 

    I foolishly thought I could jump off the front stoop and land past the 2x4 into the insulation. I didn't. It took my father holding me and my uncle pulling the 2x4 and nail out of my foot."

    —saltyspice75

    10. "As a kid, I was waiting for my mum in the car and I was playing with a big ball of Blu-Tack."

    Netflix

    "I wanted to see the car window cut the piece of Blu-Tack in half. So I stuck it on the slit where the window would arise from, leaned over to see it straight on and pressed the button to roll the window up. 

    I got my head caught between the window and the top of the car and the window pushed into my lower eye. Explaining that black eye was fun."

    —swapacoinforafish

    11. "I once cracked an egg directly into the trash can and then threw the empty shell into my mixing bowl."

    Fox / Netflix

    —zkye

    12. "I decided I would try to ride my push bike with no hands (for the first time) while going down a hill on a trick bike."

    Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures

    "The wheel turned in and I stacked it hard – I slid a few metres down the road on my left side, blood pouring out of me everywhere. 16 years later I’m still covered in scars."

    —briannac4958d98d2

    13. "When I was eight I thought it would be a good idea to climb the refrigerator."

    NBC

    "Of course, I fell off and ended up needing stitches for my forehead and cheek."

    —mysocallart

    14. "I made homemade chicken stock and forgot to put a pot under a colander in the sink. After simmering chicken, carrot, onion, celery, bay leaf, and peppercorn for hours, I dumped it right down the drain."

    Warner Bros. Pictures

    —stephaniev23

    15. "When I was eight, I wanted to see the spray come out of a can of air freshener. It burned like hell in my left eye."

    NBC

     —joeynoodles54

    16. "When I was a chef I dropped a wrapped block of butter into a huge cauldron of boiling water."

    Fox

    "I then plunged my arm into it, totally involuntarily. I was really panicked, ran my arm under lukewarm water until the chef yelled at me to start service. I had to keep going to run my arm under the water and wrapped it in a damp oven cloth to go home with."

    —ladygoldberry

    17. "My friend was teaching me how to shoot a rubber band with one hand (I still can't do it) and I put my hand in front of my face and shot myself directly in the eye at close range."

    Dimension Films

    —plzbediscreet

    18. "I called my cell phone (instead of calling my husband) from my desk phone and then I answered my cell phone not recognising the number on my caller ID."

    MTV

    —greenveep

    19. "When I was 18, I found an empty glass bottle with the cap completely stuck on it."

    NBC

    "Wanting to break the cap off, I lightly tapped it with a hammer, but it didn't budge. I hit it a little bit harder, and still nothing.

    I closed my eyes and raised the hammer high above my head and brought it down. The next thing I know I hear a loud pop and look down to see blood gushing from my hand. The bottle basically exploded and one of the glass shards sliced the knuckle of my thumb. I still have the scar on my thumb to this day."

    —willk15

    20. "God, I was an idiot child, I stuck my finger in a light socket and thought 'ooh these metal things move' and pushed – of course, I was instantly shocked."

    Fox

    —dnolan184

    What's the silliest thing you've ever done? Let us know in the comments below!