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Which Backseat Fat Kid Are You?


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  1. 1. Where can you be found on a Saturday?

    Bertrand, being responsible
    in your pants ;)
    On some type of elevated surface
    In bed, still recovering from last night
    Somewhere where there's food
    Already pregaming for the night's shenanigans
  2. 2. Which song best describes your love life?

    I Just Had Sex - The Lonely Island
    Oops I Did It Again - Britney Spears
    Ridin' Solo - Jason Derulo
    I Hate U I Love U - gnash
    Fake Love - Drake
    Promiscuous - Nelly Furtado
    Love In This Club - Usher
    I Don't Fuck With You - Big Sean
  3. 3. In your free time you are...

    What free time?
    Working for that $$$$$
    Complaining about what you SHOULD be doing
    Eating literally anything and everything
    Crying at youtube videos of cute animals or soldiers coming home
    Hanging with them boyz
  4. 4. It's your 15 year college reunion... Who is your spouse?

    A Chi Phi because we're in Theta so DUH
    I don't have a spouse... but I do have dogs?
    Someone with a solid dad bod
    Someone tall, dark, and handsome ;)
    An attractive European man
    An athlete who needs everyone to know that he's athletic by turning everything into an unnecessary competition
    A nice and nerdy engineer
    Someone hot. I don't care who, but he needs to be hot
  5. 5. What is your catch phrase?

    Does that have gluten?
    IT'S LIT
    Throw what you know everywhere you go!!!
    Can we have sex later?
    Sign and save, please!
    Take this shot, bitch
    I just want to DANCE
    Still alive, barely breathing
  6. 6. What is your ideal date?

    A romantic dinner and stroll through Hufnagle Park
    Netflix & Chill
    A spontaneous road trip adventure
    Food. Anything with food
    What is a date? What is a boy?
    A date party where I can look HOT
    Doesn't matter as long as there's alcohol
    Can we just skip the date and go right to the sex, please?
  7. 7. If you were in a frat, which frat would you be in?

    Lambda Chi Alpha
    Kappa Delta Rho
    Kappa Sigma
    Phi Gamma Delta
    Sigma Alpha Epsilon
    Tau Kappa Epsilon
    Chi Phi
    Sigma Chi
    Sigma Phi Epsilon
  8. 8. Your workout routine consists of...

    Does chugging count?
    Jumping to conclusions
    Running away from my problems
    Dodging the fuckboys
    I don't workout
  9. 9. You're at the pregame... what are you drinking?

    Long Island Iced Tea
    Fruity vodka
    Plain vodka
    Some fruity mixed drink
    Shots of anything as long as it's alcoholic
    Some fancy schmancy cocktail

Which Backseat Fat Kid Are You?

You got: ALI

Congrats! You're Ali! You are the perfect balance of fun and responsible, until after that 7th shot, when everything goes downhill. You can be found flailing your limbs at any frat party, and then rocking the ~hangover chic~ look like nothing matters. You're happy as long as you have fake nails and coffee. Keep doing you, girl and don't let the h8rs (aka frat boys) get you down.

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You got: HADLEY

Congrats! You're Hadley! You're the fraternity queen and pregrame machine. Your friends can always count on you for condoms, cuddles, and clothes. You are at your best at Lambda Chi Alpha, where your true love of frat boys and elevated surfaces doesn't go unnoticed! When you're not at the caf, you can be found falling down the stairs in Chi Phi. Oops!

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You got: KELLY

Congrats! You're Kelly! You love animals and cheese almost as much as you love dick jokes and not showering. Your sense of humor makes you the life of the party. Your lack of personal space and love of cuddling makes you a close friend at all times. When you're not wine drunk with your sisters, you're vodka drunk with your ~sisters~. You can always be found laughing it up on the suite or getting down and dirty on St. Catherine's street!

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You got: CARA

Congrats! You're Cara! You're fun, sweet, sensible, and hilarious. When you're not checking out cuties at the student mailroom, you can be found heating up leftovers from Siam or OIPs, or borrowing someone else's clothes. You bring the fun to the party, because your Irish dancing and shower playlists get everyone HYPE. You're the perfect accomplice to a night out downtown!

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