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    27 Jokes That Are Too Real For Anyone Who Had Kids After 35

    "My 9-year-old described Celine Dion as 'old pretty.' Celine is a year younger than me."

    1. Parenting over 40 = constant physical pain.

    @JayFaerber / Via Twitter: @JayFaerber

    2. It's not a tease, it's a threat.

    @YourMomsucksTho / Via Twitter: @YourMomsucksTho

    3. Is that the "old lady" from Titanic?

    @KeithSpera / Via Twitter: @KeithSpera

    4. Get used to buying diapers forever.

    @brianvanderark1 / Via Twitter: @brianvanderark1

    5. Trying to keep up with little ones can be dangerous.

    @Insomnia_Land / Via Twitter: @Insomnia_Land

    6. Might as well be a Flintstones phone.

    @PhatBoyG / Via Twitter: @PhatBoyG

    7. Offense taken.

    @KateChadwick616 / Via Twitter: @KateChadwick616

    8. Just remember you taught him how to use a spoon.

    @DianeAuten / Via Twitter: @DianeAuten

    9. Not the grandpa!

    @gstkrty953 / Via Twitter: @gstkrty953

    10. When the music of your youth becomes "classic rock."

    @snarkymomtobe / Via Twitter: @snarkymomtobe

    11. Real art tells the truth.

    12. Mom life means always having ibuprofen handy.

    @juliekellogg / Via Twitter: @juliekellogg

    13. Maybe the babysitter had a really YOUNG mom.

    @erinkiernan13 / Via Twitter: @erinkiernan13

    14. Ah, the fun games kids come up with.

    @NorahProfesora / Via Twitter: @NorahProfesora

    15. Neck waddles are the new rattles.

    @AlexBorstein / Via Twitter: @AlexBorstein

    16. Paper, plastic, or pity?

    @feministfrmwife / Via Twitter: @feministfrmwife

    17. When you find a kindred spirit aka another tired-ass mom.

    How I feel when I meet someone else in their late 30's with young kids... #oldermom #30PlusAppreciation

    18. Timing is everything.

    @HeatherOsterman / Via Twitter: @HeatherOsterman

    19. Yes, she's mine! Does she make me look younger?

    @Glennydrums / Via Twitter: @Glennydrums

    20. Liz Phair and donuts...sounds pretty great, tbh.

    @ChampyChamp / Via Twitter: @ChampyChamp

    21. The pride you feel when your kid appreciates the classics.

    @millafury / Via Twitter: @millafury

    22. Help! I sat on the floor and I can't get up!

    @SpinsterAunt / Via Twitter: @SpinsterAunt

    23. Crack is whack.

    @twmeyer10 / Via Twitter: @twmeyer10

    24. You need the naps more than the toddler.

    @PGBarkman / Via Twitter: @PGBarkman

    25. Sticky floor > rebellious teenagers.

    @Mirrorball805 / Via Twitter: @Mirrorball805

    26. Your old school supplies are now artifacts.

    @angelaahnbooks / Via Twitter: @angelaahnbooks

    27. Looks like this kid's on his way to a time out.

    @brynnshamp / Via Twitter: @brynnshamp

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