Usually, I'm in the camp that believes you should do everything within your power to celebrate your loved one's milestones. But, I — and thousands of others — am a little conflicted after reading a post by redditor Old_Explanation6923, who said they'd be missing their bestie's wedding for a Taylor Swift concert.
I know it sounds bad, but before you judge, here's the story: "The issue is that on July 13, my fiancé and I booked tickets for the Eras Tour in Milan almost one year in advance or else they'd sell out. We also had to book hotels, flights, etc. because we're staying there for four days," Old said.
"My best friend knew that I'd booked tickets on that date. She hadn't booked her wedding yet."
"She got engaged in November and booked her wedding date last month. She had told everyone she'd get married during the summer, but she never said the exact date until now, after many people kept asking her so they could know their plans. I booked the tickets this past summer when the tour dates were announced."
"When she told me the date, I told her she can't be serious. She was like, 'Why?' I reminded her I had the concert and the trip on those dates. And she told me, 'Ok? Then cancel it, obviously?' I told her, 'Sorry, I can't.'"
"I can't cancel the hotel, plane, and concert tickets. I'll have to pay a high fee to do so, and I don't think I can even cancel the concert tickets."
"I reminded her it was something I'd planned a year in advance, and she knew. She straight up told me that yes, she knew, but she didn't care because, as a friend, she'd expect me to do the right thing and drop everything for her wedding. I told her I'm not canceling my plans for something you knew a year in advance I'd do."
"She accused me of basically putting a trip and a concert over her wedding. She won't speak to me now unless I send her proof that I'm canceling everything to attend her wedding."
I'm not going to lie; I shocked myself by being on the side of someone skipping their friend's wedding because they're attending a concert. Mainly because it's not just a concert she planned; it's an entire international vacation with non-refundable tickets, stays, and travel — all of which her best friend knew before picking a date.
"Not the asshole," Reddit user 1962Michael agreed. "Under normal circumstances, I'd say you should prioritize your best friend's wedding over a concert. However, you made these plans over a year in advance, and she knew about them."
Her best friend knew for an entire year that she could plan her wedding for any day out of 365, except for this one weekend.
"Not the asshole. You're not choosing a concert over her wedding. You planned an international trip with your partner a year ago, and your friend knew about it. She did it on purpose. It's jealousy," freefall said.
It's a weird move for the best friend to pull.
"Wow, the entitlement," Prize-Bumblebee-2192 said. "She had all of the data she needed to make an informed decision as to her wedding date, and she made that decision regardless of knowing you weren’t available that weekend."
It's so weird that some people think it may have been intentional.
"Sounds like she is jealous of you attending the concert. She easily could've asked you in advance or made a plan but didn't," CareerDifficult8405 said.
"Perhaps she wasn't feeling the 'best friend' vibe because you are seeing Taylor Swift without her? Is she jealous of you?" 1962Michael posed.
"Could she not get tickets or not afford them? In any case, she is the asshole for not only scheduling her wedding at the same time, but also trying to force you to cancel your trip."
Regardless, her actions aren't exactly best-friend behavior.
"The truth is rather ironic — she's basically saying she doesn't care about what you want, your plans, or your finances. Not only would she not drop plans for something important to you, but she wouldn't even consider them. Basically, she doesn't care about you," Rebel_in_a_teacup concluded.