Many commenters agreed, and some teachers shared their own experiences:
For the most part, teachers aren't wrong for calling out that students are falling behind — according to federal data released in early 2023, public school leaders estimated that about half, or 49%, of their students began the 2022–23 year behind grade level in at least one academic subject.
"They can't even blame the pandemic," Odion began, who was a pre-K and kindergarten teacher 10 years ago, in 2013.
Odion then describes a parent-teacher conference night she had when she taught kindergarten in 2013. "First of all, a lot of people wouldn't come. You know, teachers know how that is," she admitted. But she did have a parent come with their daughter, who she calls Tia throughout the story.
"In kindergarten, you have to at least know, I think it was 80% of the 52 letters, as in uppercase and lowercase, and you have to be able to identify at random. So, I'm telling the dad that she barely knows 10 letters. And he's in denial. 'Nah, you know, she knows her letters.'" Odion proceeds to act out letter flashcards as she did with Tia, which is how she would test kids on their letters.
"I literally said, 'What letter is this?' She said something that's not it. Put another one down. 'What letter is this?' She don't know it."
"Now the dad is looking at her like, 'Tia, you know this!' and I'm looking at him like, 'No, she doesn't!' And then he tells me that 'Oh, 'cause you know, her brother was supposed to teach her.'"
Odion continues, "Her brother!? Was in sixth grade. It is not up to a child in elementary school, or middle school, or really any of your older kids, as someone who's an older child... It is not up to the kids to teach younger kids."
Odion continued with another example at her school. "In that same school, there was a student in fifth grade that was reading at a kindergarten level. This is what kindergarten reading looks like."
"A fifth grader only knows how to read these little type of words. It literally boggled my fucking mind. But the thing is, because I've of course talked to those teachers, if you suggest to hold the child back, the parent is going to fight tooth and nail because they are more concerned about the optics of a child being held back than actually taking care of the child's needs."
"I have sent notes home, I have sent emails, I've literally taken a note and pinned it to a kid's shirt and said, 'Don't take this off until your mom takes it,' and I don't get nothing back," Odion said.
Odion told BuzzFeed, "Typically when a child is behind academically, there is a conference held between the teacher and the parents, and the administrator suggests to the parents that holding their child back would be the best option. However, a lot of parents will fight it because of the optics of their child being held back being embarrassing."
As someone who was held back myself, I, and many other commenters agreed, that getting held back was the right move. I completely remember the devastation of having to redo 1st grade and re-learn things over again with the embarrassment of being "the kid who got held back," but as a 6-year-old with undiagnosed ADHD and anxiety, I am extremely grateful my parents ditched the optics and did what was best for me. I truly believe I would not have had the achievements I have today without that extra year.
Odion issued a plea to parents: "Parents, y'all can't be backseat drivers about your child's learning. You have to help reinforce it at home. You put a kid in front of that phone or iPad whenever they come home, it better be on YouTube, and it better be learning about letters and sight words. You can't tell me you can't read to the kid. It takes 10 minutes to read to the kid. No one is that busy."
And for some, Odion said Zoom-schooling due to the pandemic made parents realize their denial of their child's academic progress for the first time, despite teachers calling it out well beforehand. She said, "It's hilarious to me because when the shut down happened, and the kids had to basically learn from home, the parents that were in denial about their kids' behavior and their learning were able to see firsthand."
While the pandemic has exacerbated the amount of students performing below grade level, Odion emphasized this isn't a new phenomenon. She told BuzzFeed, "There has always been students performing below grade level. When I taught kindergarten in 2013, I had to teach some children how to hold a pencil correctly with their fingers as opposed to their fist. What has changed now is that teachers are having a larger scale of students performing below grade level."
Of course many systemic factors are at play that can impact a child's economic opportunity and educational progress, but Odion admitted that when parents don't care about their children's progress, it's their children that suffer the consequences.
She added, "And the government and institutions are banking on that. Because y'alls kids are the ones that are going to be working these jobs [i.e., jobs without security, benefits, or a living wage]... It's going to be the people that don't know that they are getting screwed over." One commenter shared her own experience witnessing this as an Army recruiter:
Overall, Odion wants parents to know that teaching does not stop in the classroom, and for children to progress, they also need educational support at home.
