The Truth Is...

Everyone thinks that I'm handling being sick with Huntingtons great. The truth is I'm falling apart. It's like I have been in a constant state of denial, since August. I was there the day I was told that I had it. I heard it quite clear. I'm even doing research for the disease. However, it didn't feel real until I started to shake really bad and not being able to type. I know this is all apart of the progression, but let's me honest...this isn't what anyone would want for their life. I'm so not trying to be woes me and I'm sorry if I am, but this wasn't in my ten year plan. You see I've always been a fighter. I've been dealt a shitty hand in life (again not trying to be woes me), but I've always been able to overcome the obstacle. With this, there's nothing that I can do. I've completely lost all control. This is the part where my faith is kicking in. I'm learning that I just have to let go. The truth is that I am dying and I've accepted that. My disease is progressing and that's just part of it. I will have good days and bad days. Today, just so happens to be a not so good one. I just have to take this new life of mine one day at a time.