Goat Tavern- London, England (4/10)

I entered this unassuming little pub expecting a pleasant afternoon meal. What I got, however, was a confectionary experience that would change my life forevermore.

23 February, 2019

Initial impression: The Goat Tavern is a charming and historic little building perfect for tourists who desperately don’t want other tourists to know they’re tourists. It is also a great place for grown adults who are at the tail end of a very long vacation with their family and just want a dark, quiet, cramped pub to hole up in for an afternoon. In case the nuance was lost on you, yes, I fell into both of these categories.

The menu was classic pub fare. I wanted to order the deluxe hot chocolate, which came with all sorts of goodies like sprinkles and extra whipped cream, but the bartender said they don't have it. Don't know why it's on the menu then. Somewhat peeved and more than a little disappointed, I ordered the regular hot chocolate.

When it arrived, my displeasure was abated by the incredible aroma and the lovely presentation. The chocolate shavings on top and the visually enchanting swirl effect almost made up for their lack of deluxe hot chocolate. The color was an excellent medium with a strong bitter taste, but not in a bad way, and they gave me some sugar packets to alleviate it. The beverage also arrived at the perfect temperature: not too hot, but still comfortingly warm, like a mother’s tender embrace.

Further reflection: The aroma was truly fantastic; it really elevated the experience. The flavor was full-bodied, bold and exciting, like the whirlwind European romance I never got to have. While this was diluted somewhat by the addition of the sugar, I still found myself enjoying the experience, now more akin to a rainy afternoon on a Paris boulevard. The very experience of drinking this hot chocolate made all the woes of that vacation seem miniscule. Why worry about silly things like crowded airports and weak WiFi when you get to sit in the Goat Tavern and enjoy such a creamy, rambunctious, wholly amorous cup of cocoa?

Once our food arrived, that’s when things began to decline. I was so focused on the incredible fish ‘n’ chips that I began to neglect my beverage, and when I finally returned to it, not only was the previously bold flavor washed out by that of my meal, it had cooled down so that it was nigh undrinkable. I felt like a spurned lover, whisked along a bold new path and swept up by the adventure and novelty of it all, then deposited on my rump on a rainy side street in Dusseldorf. Everything that had made me love that experience- the uninhibited flavor, the texture which coated my tongue with candied promises, the arrival temperature that seemed to have been crafted just for me- was now corrupted in my memory forever.

Final thoughts: If you visit the Goat Tavern, there is a spot at the corner table on the wall farthest from the door that is a little bit warmer than the rest of the pub. That is where I was sitting when I experienced my first true love- and my first true heartbreak. It wasn’t all bad, of course, but I find that whatever happy memories might remain there are now warped by the haze of loss which colors those moments. This cocoa is a cruel mistress, sweeping you up with its assertive flavor and delectable presentation, then tossing you aside like so much processed sugar. By the time I soldiered through the remainder of the beverage, I was struck by the realization that there was almost no residue at the bottom. How fitting, I see now, that it should be so cruel as to leave me without even the sour brown dregs to remember it by.

Hot Chocolate Takes is a blog run by BuzzFeed Community user humblepirate. You can follow my hot chocolate adventures on Instagram, Tumblr, and right here on BF Community.