1. RG-3PO. Fluent in over 6 million forms of first down.
Robert Griffin III - Washington Redskins
2. A 2nd round pick. #1 in our hearts.
Torrey Smith - Baltimore Ravens
3. Runs the 40 in 4.58 and destroys pizza even faster.
Cam Newton - Carolina Panthers
5. Where we’re going, you don’t need helmets.
J.J. Watt - Houston Texans
7. Means no worries. Unless you’re on offense.
Haloti Ngata - Baltimore Ravens
8. Suck on that, Wonderlic!
Brandon Weeden, Reggie Wayne, and Dwayne Bowe
9. Maybe the Heisman is just a myth.
Andrew Luck - Indianapolis Colts
10. I can get you a touchdown, believe me. There are ways, Dude.
Tim Tebow - Free Agent
11. No wonder Rutgers have their own STD
Ray Rice - Baltimore Ravens
12. Breesus Christ Superstar. The Chosen One. In the Second Round.
Drew Brees - New Orleans Saints
13. No favorite player? There’s always Lisa Frank.
Unicorn Stickers - Middle School Lockers Everywhere
#BreakFree - Virgin Mobile