1. Pre-gaming at home, then showing up to the club brimming with wine and despair
3. Assuming everyone wants a piece of your action
4. Making wishing/hoping/praying your #1 dating strategy
Make no mistake, this applies to dudes too.
6. Winning drinking contests
(Because ultimately, nobody wins.)
7. Trying to ooze sexiness in all the mundane things you do
8. Waiting and waiting and waiting for them to text you back
11. Cock-blocking / Clam-jamming
12. Seeing everything as a metaphor* for how single you are.
(*We are aware that this is a simile, not a metaphor. This is just like our last relationship where… never mind.)