Music

The 13 Cheesiest Songs About Pizza

These hungry musicians have all written odes to the holiest of foods.

Pizza is easily the world’s most wonderful foodstuff.

JUST LOOK AT THAT BEAUTIFUL THING. Accordingly, many have chosen to immortalize the glory of pizza in song. Here are their commendable efforts.

1. Bouncing Souls, “The Pizza Song”

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2. Herman Cain, “Imagine (There’s No Pizza)”

Herman Cain finally gives John Lennon’s classic the improvement it so sorely needed. (PSYCH, this is the most WTF thing of all time.)

3. HORSE The Band, “Pizza Nif”

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4. Whoever the awesome guy in this commercial is, “David’s Pizza”

5. Louis Prima, “Angelina”

This song is about a lady just as dreamy as a pizza, if that were actually possible in reality.

6. System Of A Down, “Chic ‘n’ Stu”

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Don’t be misled by the title, this song is PURE PIZZA GOODNESS.

7. Gwar, “Pepperoni”

8. The Mutants, “Pizza”

1980s pizzacore punk. What more could a human being ask for?

9. Dean Martin, “That’s Amore”

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If the first line of this song doesn’t make you hungry, you’re not a real human being.

10. The Max Levine Ensemble, “Pizza Guy”

11. Ween, “Where’d the Cheese Go?”

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This bizarre, bizarre pizza jingle was written by Ween for Pizza Hut, who declined to use it in their advertisements for some strange reason.

12. Frank Zappa, “The Blue Light”

Sometimes you’ll go to a pizza place/You go to Sharkey’s to get that/American kind of pizza/That has the ugly, waxey, fake yellow kind of yellow cheese on the top…” Hear the rest of Frank Zappa’s #realtalk about pizza chains above.

13. And, of course, the mother of all pizza jams:

In closing, a hearty THANK YOU to all the musicians who understand what it’s like to feel like this all the time.

We salute (and can relate with) you, pizza heroes.

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