1. Pick A Reason To Crawl
No one really cares what it is. But you’ve got to have one. Otherwise, it’s just another night out hitting the bars.
2. Get Hydrated
Pretend you’re an athlete if it’ll make you feel better.
3. Make Some T-Shirts
It’ll make it a lot easier for the search party to find you later on.
4. Make A Map Of All The Spots You Plan To Hit
See number 3.
5. Download Foursquare So Your Ex Can See How Much Fun You’re Having Without Them
What a loser they were. Look how much cooler you are without them.
6. Download An App To Prevent Drunk Texting
Yes, you swore you’d never do it again. And no, as a matter of fact, we don’t believe you.
7. Clear Your Schedule
You’re definitely not going to want to engage in activities of any kind for a few days.
8. Rage To Your Favorite Songs
Who knew you’d memorized the entire One Direction catalog?
9. Load Up On Cash
Credit cards lead to buying rounds of shots for your “new best friends.”
10. Install “Find My iPhone”
The first thing the person that finds your phone does is scroll through your photos and texts. Horrified yet?
11. Be Sure And Extend An Invitation To Your Parents
Nobody loves a party more than they do. And they can still drink you under the table.
12. Think About What Tattoo You’d Get
Before you inevitably end up at a tattoo parlor at 4 a.m., it’s good to know what you want before going in. Otherwise you’ll end up with a portrait of Elvis inked on your shoulder. And he’ll be fat.
13. Grab Something To Eat
Food helps prevent hangovers. Food with beer in it works even better. So grab a Craft-Beer Cheeseburger at Friday’s®. Your taste buds will thank you. So will your head.
Drink responsibly. Always use a designated driver.