11 "Easy" DIY Projects That Require Superhuman Skills

No matter what any DIY blogger says, these projects are missions impossible without professional help. On his new series Catch a Contractor, Adam Carolla and his team are tracking down shoddy contractors and bringing them to justice. Tune in Sunday nights at 10/9c on SPIKE.

1. Anything with reclaimed wood

weldhouse.com (CC BY ND http://2.0) / Via Flickr: 33143672@N08

From where does one even reclaim wood? Is “reclaiming” just another word for “stealing”?

2. Wine bottle displays.

VetrinaDelVino / Via etsy.com

But what if it falls? BUT WHAT IF IT FALLS?

3. Vintage mirrors.

Jill Ferry / Getty Images / Via gettyimages.com

Know how to get this look? Acid. You have to pour acid on a mirror until it starts eating through the glass.

Acid.

Guys.

Acid.

4. Anything that involves cutting glass.

Courtesy of Domestic Construction / Via domestic-construction.com

Do people die cutting glass? I think people die cutting glass.

5. Papier mâché bowls.

panselinos / Via etsy.com

Oh! All you do is blow up a balloon, papier mâché half the balloon, let it dry for 24 hours, pop the balloon, take gold leaf and lacquer it to the inside of the bowl, let it dry for 24 hours, flip the bowl and paint one coat, let it dry for 24 hours, paint a second coat, let it dry for 24 hours, and VOILA!

A decorative bowl that cannot hold anything with weight or mass.

6. Apple box furniture.

lartdelacaisse / Via etsy.com

How do you make it not look like a pile of garbage? I mean, it IS a pile of garbage, but how do you make it not LOOK like a pile of garbage?

7. Reupholstering.

Despina Damson (CC BY http://2.0) / Via Flickr: 23717595@N05

Do you like that chair? Don't reupholster it by yourself. It's a trap. It's a HUGE trap.

8. "Simple" hand-drawn designs.

trinako / Via etsy.com

You know how in high school, there would be people who were really good at doodling? Just GOOD at it. The patterns looked nice, even if they weren't complicated.

Now think about what your doodles looked like. Would you want that on a coffee mug or, worse, your wall?

9. Anything that involves soldering.

Dorling Kindersley / Getty Images

How do you even pronounce "soldering?" Does hot glue work instead?

10. Art made of bent wire.

RaindropVintageShop / Via etsy.com

You will bleed and you will fail.

11. Replacing a door.

Lucas Masters (CC BY http://2.0) / Via Flickr: 35518575@N00

Sure! It's just a couple of screws. Oh! Unless you mis-measured the door. Or the frame. Or the new knobs and locks. Or unless the new door warps. Or shrinks. Or breaks. But you know, easy stuff.

If you get burned by a bad contractor, Adam Carolla has your back.

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Watch Catch a Contractor Sunday nights at 10/9c on SPIKE.