1. It always starts out innocently enough, with a massive crush on some lovely lady.
4. And you start to think about all the lovely things you two could do together.
9. You may experience feelings similar to the five stages of grief:
Symptoms include: Feelings of helplessness — you know the odds of both of you leaving the situation unscathed are slim to none.
Symptoms include: Complete loss of perspective, even when — inevitably — you’re reminded she’s into dudes.