1.
Because blimey! — we bloody near walloped you yankee ninnies.
2.
It's a day to mourn America's first (and brilliant) name:
3.
And remember what could have been:
4.
You and your mates can faff about in hackney carriages instead of dodgy taxis.
5.
You can say, "I'm chuffed to bits, chaps," and it's not even weird.
6.
If Britain had won the war, you would have one less reason to go to whichever Dakota Mount Rushmore is in.
7.
It's a time to lament the loss of double double-decker buses.
9.
Toodle pip, Westminster-er Palace.
10.
At least there's still crumpets. Scrummy, squidgy crumpets.
11.
Oh, and it’s a totally real holiday and not just some ambush marketing campaign to sell more Newcastle Brown Ale!
If Britain won the Revolutionary War, it would've been great — even Zachary Quinto thinks so. Get a taste at IfWeWon.com.
