This is Cool Ranch Doritos Beer Queso.
AKA The best drunk snack for anyone who like cheese, beer, and Doritos.
BEHOLD.
Remember these directions well, for the next time you're in need of an easy boozy snack.
Step 1: SMASH THE DORITOS.
Step 2: Cut the Velveeta loaf into cubes.
Yes, they call it a loaf.