Music

14 Times Kylie Minogue’s "Sexercize" Video Made Me Question My Homosexuality

I’M GAY WHAT IS HAPPENING TO MEEEEEEEEEE.

COMING TO A GAY-CONVERSION CLINIC NEAR YOU…

**Calls Marcus Bachmann**

…it’s Kylie Minogue’s new video for “Sexercize,” which is lit’rally and figuratively MAKING ME QUESTION EVERYTHING I BELIEVE IN.

And by everything I believe in, I mean penises and boys and boys and penises and EVERYTHING holy!

WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME?!?!!

1. That pommel horse.

2. THAT POMMEL HORSE.

5. Butts on wire fences!

6. Sexy, sweaty Child’s Pose!!

(That sounds weird)

7. Butt-crack silhouettes!

8. SEXY WEDGIES.

10. Actual sweat consumption!

11. Strange standing-cuddling.

12. VERTICAL BOUNCING.

13. A FULL-ON ORGY.

14. *SCREAMS*

In the words of the almighty mystical songwriting queen:

Watch for yourself. Gay men, you’ve been warned:

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