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Eva Mendes, You May Have Won The Battle, But You Haven’t Won The War

Just a little note.

1. HI, HELLO, HEY THERE. GOOD DAY, EVA.

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2. OK, you won.

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3. Congrats! Really, I’m happy for you. You did it!

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4. But I just have to say. I’ve read history and I know some things. While everything may seem really happy and great now, I’d just thought I’d give you a heads up.

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5. LET ME BREAK IT DOWN FOR YOU:

6. Your dog speaks French…

7. … Ryan’s dog probably does not. George isn’t into that shit.

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8. That’s a problem.

9. I also found this interesting article… it’s very interesting.

10. That’s a problem.

11. And another thing I heard about you is that your favorite food is bread. Ryan’s favorite food is calamari.

12. That’s a problem.

13. So, while the battle may be won…

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14. … the war isn’t over.

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15. The thirst will never be quenched.

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16. There will always be a map to ur man.

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17. Oh also, here’s this picture and I don’t know what it means but it concerns me.

18. Congrats!

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