1. This tweet about a strand of hair:
I swallowed a strand of my hair and now everything is ruined.
2. This tweet about forgetting where she put things:
I keep hiding things in secret spots in my apartment and then forgetting where I hid them. Would've been the worst pirate ever.
3. This one about landlines.
My home phone is ringing. I did not know I had a home phone. Interesting development.
4. This tweet about getting jalepeño in her eye.
I will always remember today as the day I cooked dinner, rubbed my eyes, and then learned that jalapeños are NATURE'S PEPPER SPRAY.
5. This tweet about this classic problem.
Super weird how all of a sudden everyone is busy when I text them "hey want to come over and have a Scrabble tournament??"
6. This tweet about halloweentime:
It's October AKA the month when the horror movie ads start and at any moment a dead doll or corpse ghost could pop up on my tv. #struggles
7. This one about all the lost hair ties.
It's crazy to think about how many countries I've lost hair ties in.
8. This one about brushing her hair.
When my mom says "Think you should brush the back of your hair?", it's really less of a question and more of a call to action.
9. This one about street food.
Can someone please invent an app that tells me where I can get the food that I smell in the air? #newyork
10. This one about cat problems.
That moment when your cat casually walks up,then abruptly ATTACKS your custom satin Oscar de la Renta gown during your fitting for Met Ball.
11. And MORE cat problems.
It is a daily struggle for me to not buy more cats.
12. This tweet about the emotion one feels upon seeing Blue Ivy.
Thoughts: I'm glad everyone's discovering Jessie J! Met Iggy in an elevator and she was super nice. Every time I see Blue Ivy, I cry. #VMAs
13. This one about loving Fall Out Boy 4 ever.
One of the only unchanging things about my life in the last 10 years is my love of Paramore, Ingrid Michaelson, Fall Out Boy & Coldplay.
14. This tweet about the scissor dilemma.
That moment when you buy scissors and then you try to open them but you can't because you DON'T HAVE SCISSORS.
15. This one showing concern for post viral-video fame.
I need there to be a follow up for every viral video letting me know the people/cats in them are ok. Like lol but no seriously, you alright?
16. This tweet about how she spends her nights.
I'm 100. Sorry not sorry. #lawandorder #tea #idontreallyknowwhathashtaggingisordoes
