1.
Crime of pooping your pants in public:
3.
Crime against hats second offense:
5.
Crime of making us scared cause he looks scary:
6.
Crime of OPENING AN UMBRELLA INSIDE.
7.
Crime against tighty-whities:
8.
Crime against leather pants with no fly:
9.
Crime against the color red:
10.
Crime against using a Segway:
12.
Crime against mustaches: