Entertainment

The 29 Hottest TV Hook-Ups Of 2013

From Nick and Jess on New Girl to Nolan and Patrick on Revenge, here are the kisses and couples that excited us most this year.

1. Emma/Hook (Once Upon a Time)

 

Things are confusing for Emma these days: She’s crushing on a pirate, but her baby daddy — who she thought was dead — just turned up alive. It’s complicated. At least she got to make out with Captain Hook when she had the chance.

2. Rebekah/Marcel (The Originals)

 

Oh, sure, they had a history — but it took a while for these vampire frenemies to rekindle that flame. On the plus side, it looked like it was definitely worth the wait. And pissing Klaus off is always an added bonus.

3. Matt/Rebekah (The Vampire Diaries)

 

But before Marcel — or, er, between Marcel hook-ups — Rebekah dabbled with a human in Mystic Falls. Her flirtation and eventual consummation with Matt was sweet and humanizing, not to mention long overdue.

4. Stefan/Katherine (The Vampire Diaries)

Turning Katherine human allowed for some of this season’s most compelling stories, particularly her helping cure Stefan’s PTSD in the sexiest way possible. (Note: Yes, they hooked up before this, but that was a really long time ago.)

5. Nolan/Patrick (Revenge)

 

After Nolan’s dud of a romance with Padma in Season 2, we needed to see Mr. Ross get his groove back. And he definitely did with Patrick, Victoria’s studly son. Whatever impediments stand in their way, kudos to Revenge for not holding back.

6. Mary/Francis (Reign)

Mary Queen of Scots and Francis are destined to end up together. If you don’t believe me, read a history book. Regardless, it’s been a pleasure watching their courtship, which is a lot sexier on TV than it was in real life.

7. Bill/Virginia (Masters of Sex)

 

Those who know the real story behind Masters of Sex know that — spoiler alert — Bill and Virginia end up married. The first season has seen them explore their sexual relationship through science, with the constant subtext of something more.

8. Austin/Margaret (Masters of Sex)

One of the show’s most unlikely pairings turned out to be the most satisfying, as Austin found his missing libido and gave Margaret what she so desperately needed: affection, passion, and, yes, her first orgasm.

9. Stiles/Lydia (Teen Wolf)

 

FINALLY. Lydia decided the best way to calm Stiles down was to kiss him, which somehow actually worked. More to the point, it was the consummation of something that has been brewing for three seasons — and not only in Stiles’ imagination.

10. Danny/Ethan (Teen Wolf)

 

Wow. The steamiest sex scene on Teen Wolf this season belonged to Danny and Ethan. At first it seemed like Ethan was faking it with Danny — because, well, he was — but by the end, we saw real emotion there. And a lot of attraction.

11. Marley/Jake (Glee)

FOX / via brochy

 

Of Glee’s new class, Marley stands out the most. And she and Jake made a lovely pairing — until, you know, he screwed it all up by having sex with a cheerleader because Marley refused to put out. Men are scum.

12. Quinn/Santana (Glee)

 

Look, it was a wedding. Things happen. But honestly, you have to give props to Glee for accurately representing the spectrum of human sexuality. Santana’s a lesbian, and Quinn — well, she might just be experimenting. Good for her.

13. Zoe/Kyle/Madison (American Horror Story: Coven)

 

Well, it was definitely one of the most fucked-up hook-ups this year. After catching Kyle’s Frankenstein body humping Madison’s reanimated corpse, poor Zoe felt betrayed. Luckily, her creepy friends invited her to join in for a zombie threeway.

14. Jon Snow/Ygritte (Game of Thrones)

HBO / via maddenss

 

Ygritte is fond of saying, “You know nothing, Jon Snow,” but he’s clearly doing something right. While their passion was clear — and pretty uncensored, because HBO — things took a turn. Don’t look for a happy ending on Game of Thrones.

15. Stephen/Cara (The Tomorrow People)

 

So wrong but so right. This pairing is inappropriate on a few levels, but they look damn good together — and on The CW, sometimes that’s enough. The ability to teleport somewhere more intimate is one of the perks of being a Tomorrow Person.

16. Jenna/Collin (Awkward)

Feelings about Collin have been mixed, which is fair. But whether or not you dig the character, he did send Jenna down an interesting path — cheating on her comfortable boyfriend and eventually taking a dark turn.

17. Hannah/Joshua (Girls)

HBO / via keefer-s

 

Girls attracted controversy with the gorgeous episode “One Man’s Trash,” in which Hannah meets a handsome doctor named Joshua and spends the weekend with him. It’s a smart, sexy, heartbreaking love story — all in 30 minutes.

18. Nick/Jess (New Girl)

 

Will they or won’t they? Turns out they will — and we didn’t even have to wait that long to see it. Nick and Jess felt very much like endgame territory, so it’s nice that New Girl isn’t unnaturally dragging things out.

19. Sookie/Warlow (True Blood)

 

Yes, he killed her parents. In his defense, they totally deserved it. Sadly, Warlow turned out to be a major asshole for other reasons, but his glowing faerie sex with Sookie will go down as one of the more ridiculous sex scenes on this silly show.

20. Jessica/James (True Blood)

 

They came together under less-than-ideal circumstances, but there’s something really sweet (and equally hot) about Jess and her new squeeze James. She deserves a nice, normal, hunky vampire. We’ll try to ignore the regrowing hymen thing.

21. Will/Alana (Hannibal)

How can something so wrong feel so right? It probably helps that Hugh Dancy and Caroline Dhavernas are two of the most attractive people on the planet. Anyway, this was a nice break from the bleak plot and relentless gore.

22. Danny/Lacey (Twisted)

 

Nothing like a new romance to muck up a murder investigation. Danny and Lacey were just friends until he came back into her life. And possibly poisoned her best friend. But we know better than that, right?

23. Jacob/Paul (The Following)

 

Surprise, the gay neighbors aren’t actually gay — they’re serial killer disciples in disguise! Surprise No. 2, sometimes they have sex anyway! Jacob and Paul’s complicated relationship was a highlight of The Following’s uneven first season.

24. Jacob/Paul/Emma (The Following)

 

Enter Emma. Things took a kinky turn when Paul and Emma decided the best way to deal with Jacob’s jealousy would be a steamy shower threesome. It kind of worked? The morning after cuddles looked pretty awkward, though.

25. Chalky/Daughter (Boardwalk Empire)

 

Season 4 of Boardwalk Empire finally gave Chalky the spotlight he deserved. Part of that was his affair with gorgeous singer Daughter Maitland, which had him entangled with the dangerous Dr. Narcisse. Totally worth it.

26. Olivia/Jake (Scandal)

 

I’m sorry, Olitz fans. Really, I am. But adding Jake to the mix shook things up for Olivia and Fitz in new and interesting ways. Whether they’ll end up together in the end — highly doubtful — it’s been fun watching them distract each other.

27. Quinn/Charlie (Scandal)

 

OK, so it’s not the healthiest relationship. (Also, calling her your girlfriend is a little presumptuous, Charlie. Clingy much?) Still, there’s something delightfully fucked-up about this pairing. What more can you ask of from Scandal?

28. Carrie/Sebastian (The Carrie Diaries)

 

Before Carrie and Big, there was Carrie and Sebastian. Sure, we never heard about him on Sex and the City, but let’s just assume he made an impression. His kissing skills alone look like something Carrie wouldn’t forget.

29. Walt/Bennett (The Carrie Diaries)

Aw, young, gay, barely-out-of-the-closet love! Walt and Bennett are preposterously cute together, and while it seemed like Bennett was going to dick Walt around, it looks like he’s ready to be serious. As serious as Bennett can be, at least.

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