5. Walk with your breasts pushed forward, no matter how awkward it feels.
8. Seriously, though. If you want to look cool, you should smoke.
9. There is nothing more shameful than being a virgin.
10. Your friends are just waiting till you leave the room to make fun of you.
11. The only thing cooler than smoking is smoking while drinking.
14. Your guardian angel will show up once you screw up your life sufficiently.
15. It’s not OK for two men to express affection toward one another.
17. A happy ending means changing yourself and compromising your morals for a guy.
19. If a boy really likes you, he’ll act insane for several minutes.
21. Cars can fly.
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