1. If you have the opportunity to add a wooden pipe to an ensemble? For God's sake, do it.
2. Casual doesn't have to be grungy, mmkay?
3. Geek Chic is absolutely still a thing.
4. Nothing says "I studied a foreign language in college" quite like a beret.
5. If you can't commit to the shoes, don't wear them.
6. Actually buying hats is a fool's game. Take up knitting, ya dingus!
7. A toupee, when used correctly, can actually be a conversation-starter!
8. Even if it's not cold, hats can help disguise a very bad hair day.
9. It is never NOT the right time for a bow tie.
10. I repeat. IT IS NEVER NOT THE RIGHT TIME FOR A BOW TIE.
11. Layers can help disguise unwanted fluff in the tummy area.
12. Eyewear should always complement your natural bone structure.
13. Don't wear your argyle sweater if you plan on rolling in the grass.
14. A nonchalant attitude is the key to making any fashion statement work.
15. Nothing is more embarrassing than Purina on a lapel – watch your table manners!
And remember: you're never fully dressed without a smile!
