1. Is Johnny’s real name Bob? Does he have a secret life as a violinist-auto mechanic?
2. Why is Johnny wearing two watches? What, one watch isn’t good enough for you?
5. Why is Deppy-poo experiencing such inner anguish in the rain? Put on a jacket! You’ll catch your death.
7. OK, seriously who was Johnny Depp’s stylist during his 21 Jump Street era?
8. Who pissed Johnny off?
9. Why is Johnny Depp showing us his belly button? I feel as though he is trying to make a point about it, but I’m missing it.
10. How is it that a man dress like a bumblebee and still look this good?
12. Why is Johnny not fighting back against that evil clothespin? What is happeninnnng.
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