1. 1/2 Sly (New Jersey Nets)
Cool: 10 — Seriously, this thing’s all of four feet tall and scurries around the court. It rules.
Ridiculous: 10 — IT’S A MINI-MASCOT.
Potential Basketball Skillz: 10 — 1/2 Sly would go all Spud Webb on everyone.
2. The Gorilla (Phoenix Suns)
Cool: 9 — He’s the consummate entertainer-mascot.
Ridiculous: 10 — Why the hell do the Suns have a gorilla for a mascot, again?
Potential Basketball Skillz: 10 — Two words: flaming hoops.
3. Benny the Bull (Chicago Bulls)
Cool: 10 — Among the friends of Benny the Bull: Justin Bieber, Rahm Emanuel, John Legend.
Ridiculous: 8 — Never seen a bull with that much hair.
Potential Basketball Skillz: 8 — He takes after Jordan, you know.
4. Bango (Milwaukee Bucks)
Cool: 9 — Major bonus points for the sidekick.
Ridiculous: 5 — Basically just a guy in a dog suit with antlers on his head.
Potential Basketball Skillz: 9 — Have you ever seen Bango dunk? Deer can dunk.
5. The Raptor (Toronto Raptors)
Cool: 8 — Hanging with Wayne Gretzky is pretty fly.
Ridiculous: 7 — Looks less like a raptor than former Raptor Chris Bosh.
Potential Basketball Skillz: 7 — Another high-flying mascot, but that tail can’t be helpful on the break.
6. G-Wiz (Washington Wizards)
Cool: 8 — Rocking that wizard hat.
Ridiculous: 9 — Muppet in a wizard hat.
Potential Basketball Skillz: 4 — Wizards aren’t known for their athleticism.
7. Hugo the Hornet (New Orleans Hornets)
Cool: 7 — Fat, human-sized bug riding a scooter? Hang with me any day.
Ridiculous: 6 — “A Bug’s Life” paved the way, though it’s still unsettling to see this big of an insect.
Potential Basketball Skillz: 7 — Wings AND hands. That’s key.
8. Harry the Hawk (Atlanta Hawks)
Cool: 8 — It’s a hawk that dances like Michael Jackson.
Ridiculous: 8 — It’s a hawk that dances like Michael Jackson.
Potential Basketball Skillz: 3 — Learning how to dance like Michael Jackson doesn’t leave a lot of time for your jump shot.
9. Griz (Memphis Grizzlies)
Cool: 5 — I’m a big fan of bears, but he doesn’t really look that much like a bear.
Ridiculous: 4 — Pretty tame.
Potential Basketball Skillz: 9 — A bear would LEVEL people on the basketball court.
10. Moondog (Cleveland Cavaliers)
Cool: 6 — Cool dog.
Ridiculous: 7 — Wasn’t that ridiculous until David West punched him in the face.
Potential Basketball Skillz: 5 — Dogs have hustle.
11. Burnie (Miami Heat)
Cool: 4 — Overgrown muppets are sort of cool, but not really that cool.
Ridiculous: 8 — What is it, after all. Plus, the basketball for a nose.
Potential Basketball Skillz: 5 — Doesn’t seem that athletic. In fact, it’s a little portly.
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