1. EXHIBIT A: In their Thanksgiving night game against the Patriots, the Jets trail 14-0. Then Mark Sanchez runs into Brandon Moore’s ass, fumbles, and the Pats take it for a score.
2. Your eyes did not deceive you: he fumbles because he runs into his teammate’s butt.
3. Look into Mark Sanchez’s eyes and see pure, weapons-grade existential angst.
4. EXHIBIT B: On the ensuing kickoff, Joe McKnight gets nailed. He fumbles. Julian Edelman catches it in midair. Touchdown. Pats lead 28-0.
5. Pity poor Rex Ryan. Also, if you know of any job openings, please shoot him an email.
6. Here’s video of the whole dilapidated mess. By the time you’re reading this, the Patriots probably lead by 300. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody.
Here Are The Top Stories
- Police in Athens used pepper spray on protesters two days ahead of Greece's major bailout vote.
- A medical helicopter has crashed in Colorado. The crash killed the pilot and injured two crew members.
- Serena Williams survived an upset at Wimbledon and defeated current Britain's Heather Watson. She'll play her older sister Venus in the next round of the tournament ?