18 Animals Trying To Sell You DRUGS

Come sit with me on my Doritos-dusted paisley couch.

3. Wanna buy JRUGZ??

5. Touch this throw rug, man. Just feel it.

6. Isn’t it soft??

7. No rush. Let me put on this dank song for you.

Unknown Mortal Orchestra, “Ffunny Ffrends”

9. OK, here’s the deal: I have three marijuanas.

10. Actually, 12 mari-huanas.

11. All of the mari-huanas.

12. Don’t buy from that other crimepunk in a Toyota.

13. Look at this face. Can this face tell a lie?

15. We’re good? Follow me down this creepy gutter.

16. Have you ever wondered this?

17. No? OK, sorta running out of awkward small talk here…

19. Five? You said five, yes? Excellent.

Here are your drugs. That will be 3 billion dollars.

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