10. Mango splitter. What, you split your mangoes with a knife? Get the fuck out of my office.
13. File folder-style tomato slicer. I guess you still have to use a knife like a rube, though.
16. Tomato huller. Did you know tomatos had hulls? Me neither, but I’m disgusted by them now.
21. Lemon squeezer. Actually, I have one and use it all the time. Great tool.
24. Apple corer/medieval torture device. This won’t look weird at all on your countertop.
25. Spiral vegetable slicer. Only a jerk would cut straight carrot slices.
27. You’ll need the jalepeno corer for your special jalapeno popper roasting rack, of course
Here Are The Top Stories
- A large object discovered Wednesday on the coast of the island of Réunion belongs to the same type of aircraft as missing Malaysia Airlines Flight 370, a U.S. official told the Associated Press.
- A University of Cincinnati officer has been charged with murder for shooting Samuel Dubose, an unarmed black man.
- Uber drivers waiting for ride requests near the International Airport of Mexico City were pelted with rocks, sticks, eggs, and flour yesterday afternoon. Local authorities are investigating the incident.