A shocking revelation has surfaced about the mascot for everyone’s favorite roof-of-the-mouth-destroying cereal: The Cap’n might not really be a captain.
The Cap’n (full name: Cap’n Horatio Magellan Crunch) wears a jacket with three stripes on the sleeve. According to the U.S. Navy’s ranking system, three stripes indicates the rank of commander. To be a captain, you need four stripes. A commander is a lesser ranking than captain.
But is it illegal to impersonate a Captain if you aren’t really one?
In 2006, George W. Bush passed the Stolen Valor Act, which made it a crime to pretend that you earned a military award or medal. However, in 2012, the Supreme Court overturned the Act with a vote of 6-3, on the basis that it violated the First Amendment.
A new version of the bill, the Stolen Valor Act of 2012, that focuses on people who profit off fake medals was signed into law by President Obama on June 3, 2013.
However, both bills related to false claims of earning medals, not false claims of rank.
3. The Cap’n has issued this statement via Twitter denying the fraud:
Regarding today’s rumors… of course I’m a Cap’n! It’s the Crunch - not the clothes - that make a man. #PaidMyDues
But how far does this possible fraud go? Does it implicate Sea Dog, the Cap’n’s loyal canine companion who has the greatest Twitter account ever? (All he tweets is “Howl.”)
6. We investigated further:
@RealCapnCrunch what about @RealSeaDog? is he EVEN A DOG?
@katienotopoulos @RealCapnCrunch HHHOOooooooOOOWwwwWWWLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!
@RealSeaDog @katienotopoulos Story checks out.
9. I, for one, believe the dog.
Correction: The Stolen Valor Act of 2012 was signed into law on June 3, 2012. A previous version misstated this.
We've got your WKND covered.
- More debris – believed to be part of the missing aircraft MH370 – has been found washed up on the Indian Ocean island of Réunion on Sunday.
- Cilla Black, the legendary English singer and TV star, has died at her home in Spain, according to local police. She was 72 years old.
- A conservation group at Oxford University told BuzzFeed News that media reports of Jericho's death were not true and that the 11-year-old lion was "alive and well".