Baseball Player Writes "You Are A Faggot" On His Eye Black

Toronto’s Yunel Escobar has a strange way of getting himself hyped up for games. UPDATE!

Yunel Escobar indicating how many times he’ll have to apologize publicly for being a knob. Tom Szczerbowski / Getty Images

Yunel Escobar!

What would ever possess you to write “tu ere maricon” (sic) (translates to “you are a faggot”) on your face? I can’t think of a single instance where that thought could enter your head (“Got a few options here…Bible verse…say hello to mom…pre-emptive attack on imaginary homosexual”) and not be dismissed as the dumbest of all possible ideas. And I’m even conceding that you think it’s acceptable to dislike gay people. What I don’t get is, what did you think would happen? I mean I know the Blue Jays aren’t having the greatest season, but that doesn’t mean that literally nobody is watching. You’re not on the Astros, man — you play professional sports.

Also, do you know that Spanish isn’t some secret language that you and your friends made up? If you had written your message in Elvish, you might have been able to fly under the radar, but you don’t seem like the kind of guy who gets down with the Tolkien. You seem like the kind of guy who has a special funny name that he calls people who would write messages in Elvish.

Some have suggested that you didn’t write this. That it was a clubhouse prank. If that’s the case, I apologize, but let’s be real, that’s not the case. The way these strips work is that you write on them before peeling them off a page and putting them on your face. And as Kevin Kaduk at Big League Stew points out, the handwriting seems to match other eye black you’ve worn! The “prank” possibility is pretty thin. (Also, the correct form of that prank would be “Yo Soy ____.”) (We suggest “un member de several different Mariah Carey fan clubs.”)

I know things are frustrating in Toronto these days. I know you are probably watching the Orioles and thinking to yourself, “we should have been the ones to make the leap.” I know you’re probably finding ways to amuse yourself until the season finally ends. But here’s a thought: Be less of a dickbag.

Sincerely, Jack

UPDATE:The Blue Jays have reportedly suspended Escobar for three games.

UPDATE 2: His salary and his salary for those games will be donated to GLAAD and the You Can Play campaign. Additionally Escobar will be working with GLAAD on that campaign.

UPDATE 3: Yunel Escobar’s press conference was… interesting. Some highlights per HarballTalk. Escobar apologized and said “I have friends who are gay.” A reporter asked who, to which Escobar responded, “the person who decorates my house is gay … the person who does my hair is gay.” No word on whether Escobar is friends with any Broadway actors or fashion designers.

Additionally after saying that he didn’t mean it to be offensive, Escobar was asked what he meant by it then. The shortstop’s response? He just didn’t mean it. “It’s a word that is said often among the Latino community.” I think that’s part of the problem, Yunel.

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