11 New Inductees For The Handsome Men’s Club In 2013

1. Ryan Gosling

The hottest man of 2012 was TOTALLY ABSENT from the last meeting. Not even mentioned. Doesn’t Dempsey know he’s so 2005? Hasn’t that hospital in Grey’s Anatomy blown up like a dozen times already? Gosling for president.

Image by Frazer Harrison / Getty Images

2. Christian Bale

Because no one says no to Batman. Seriously, he’ll yell at you for like six hours.

Image by Mario Anzuoni / Reuters

3. P. Diddy / Puff Daddy / Sean Combs / Whatever

He can bring the style. He can bring the entertainment. He can bring the FREE VODKA.

Image by Mario Anzuoni / Reuters

4. Daniel Craig

Bond 6.0 has worn enough designer suits and destroyed enough private property while wearing them. I mean, did you SEE that scene from Casino Royale where Bond emerges from the water for some reason and the sun is hitting him at the perfect angle and angels weep at the sight of his abdomen? Why isn’t he in this club yet?

Image by Sony Pictures, Francois Duhamel, File / AP

5. Joseph Gordon Levitt

He’s old enough now, right? We think he’s old enough now. He wears suits. He has the words “Executive Producer” attached to him, sometimes. He has engaged in fisticuffs with Bruce Willis. That’s grown-up stuff right there.

Image by Alberto E. Rodriguez / Getty Images

6. Just pick a male Avenger. Any male Avenger.

DOWNEY. HEMSWORTH. EVANS. RENNER. JACKSON. THE LIST IS AS ENDLESS AS THE THREATS TO EARTH.

Image by Disney, Zade Rosethal / AP

7. Michael Fassbender

We’ve pretty much seen all of his qualifications.

Image by Abbot Genser/MCT

8. Matthew Bomer

You may not know this stud McMuffin, because you’ve probably never watched a single episode of White Collar. That’s OK. Just look at that face.

Image by Jesse Grant / Getty Images

9. Jon Hamm

Jon Hamm’s got that handsome face that can charm any lady, and spew advertising nonsense all day and night and the following day. That face could convince anybody to buy what it’s selling. It’s no wonder he went from a greasy coat peddler to a whiskey guzzling executive.

Image by David Livingston / Getty Images

10. Jamie Foxx

He sings. He dances. He does stand-up. He’s finally the main character of a Tarantino movie. He’s Ray Charles. Tom Cruise has held a gun to his head. THIS GUY DOES EVERYTHING.

Image by Tim Alban / Getty Images

11. Justin Bieber

JUST KIDDING. Call us in twenty years, Kidz Bop.

Image by Michael Kovac / Getty Images

In case you missed the last meeting…

Video available at: http://youtube.com/watch?v=MyGJXLxtVEo.

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