1. Adam and Eve
Things might have gone better if the original sinners were never-nudes.
2. That Gotye Song
“But you didn’t have to cut me off” [Pans down to reveal jorts]
3. The VMAs
You can blur lines, but you can never blur jorts.
4. The Statue of Liberty
Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to wear jorts.
5. The Drawing Scene in Titanic
“Draw me like one of your French jorts.”
6. Pharell at the Oscars
If you’re gunna go casual, take it all the way.
8. The Bill from Schoolhouse Rock
The committee on jorts is always in session.
10. Paula Deen
Them are jorts, ya’ll.
14. The Royal Wedding
No one would be looking at her hat, that’s for sure.
15. The Little Mermaid
Step 1: Get Legs. Step 2: Put jorts on them.
17. Lady Godiva
Everyone knows you shouldn’t ride naked on a horse.
JK BEY YOU’RE PERFECT DON’T EVER CHANGE.
*hides from Solange*
19. The Louisiana Purchase
It was already a good deal. But it would have been a GREAT deal if jorts were included.
20. Tonya Harding
10.0 for jorts!
21. Lindsay Lohan’s Mugshots
23. The Moon Landing
One small step for man, one giant leap for jeankind.
24. Every Different Sport
25. The Mona Lisa
Although, who’s to say this *~didn’t~* happen.
AND A TINY ADORABLE SELENA GOMEZ ALSO IN JORTS.