Books·Posted on Mar 2, 201521 Times R.L. Stine Was So Sassy It Hurt"My job: to terrify kids."by Jarry LeeBuzzFeed StaffLinkFacebookPinterestTwitterMail 1. On apps: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine I hope you will all buy my new app. The app tells you when you're about to buy an app you don't need. 03:04 PM - 07 Apr 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 2. On buying his books: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine Interesting statistic: If you all bought 1 Goosebumps book a month, it would be enough books to reach from here to my bank. 04:00 PM - 11 Jan 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 3. On talking about the weather: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine Looking forward to more snow tonight. I don't think people have been talking enough about the weather. 11:59 PM - 25 Mar 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 4. On Christmas: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine Isn't this Christmas morning? Why are you on Twitter. 01:55 PM - 25 Dec 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 5. On Zombie Halloween: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine Has there been a mistake? Zombie Halloween didn't win a National Book Award? 04:24 AM - 20 Nov 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 6. On Kickstarter: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine Thank you all for joining my Kickstarter. Only $1 away from buying me a cheeseburger deluxe for lunch. You're the best! 03:09 PM - 23 Aug 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 7. On John Travolta: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine Does anyone know where I can buy the new Adele Dazeem CD? 04:11 PM - 03 Mar 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 8. On Blockbuster: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine I sold all my Bitcoins. Too risky. Am investing all my money in the wave of the future--Blockbuster stores. 04:14 PM - 04 Mar 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 9. On his grandson: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine Please don't look at this pic of my grandson Dylan Stine. We want to respect his privacy. 10:51 PM - 31 Aug 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 10. On living abroad: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine I'm so glad I live in New York City and not in the United States. 03:00 AM - 03 Nov 2010 Reply Retweet Favorite 11. On Valentine's Day: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine Where do I get my fresh Valentines hearts? At the police morgue in the Village. (You have to know someone.) 05:23 PM - 14 Feb 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 12. On children: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine ..it's perfectly acceptable--and hilarious-- to ridicule a child. 02:36 PM - 24 Mar 2011 Reply Retweet Favorite 13. On his birthday: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine So, what are you all doing for my birthday on Wednesday? Don't go to any trouble. 05:06 PM - 06 Oct 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 14. On Canada: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine My books here in Calgary are translated into Canadian, I think. Hope I can read them. 04:44 AM - 25 Apr 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 15. On New Year's resolutions: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine I can't decide whether my New Years resolution to be more decisive is a good idea or not. 03:57 PM - 02 Jan 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 16. On animal videos: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine Does anyone know where I can find some cute animal videos? Doctor says I need to throw up this morning. 03:00 PM - 15 Feb 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 17. On technology: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine My Palm Pilot is acting strange and won't let me access my Friendster account. Any suggestions? 11:11 PM - 03 Jul 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 18. On Simon Cowell: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine A British woman says she is allergic to Simon Cowell. She says any glimpse of him causes chest pain, cold sweats, & vomiting. #youtoo? 03:40 PM - 02 Nov 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 19. On the Goosebumps movie: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine Release of the Goosebumps movie has been moved up from March, 2016 to August, 2015. Please don't start standing in line yet. 10:09 PM - 01 May 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 20. On the Jets: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine Question: Should I keep watching the Jets week after week, or should I shove two pencils through my nostrils into my brain? 03:01 AM - 25 Nov 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 21. And on this "cute" dog: R.L. Stine @RL_Stine Remember this cute guy? 07:09 PM - 10 Jun 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite Thanks for that, R.L. Stine. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF