Comedy·Posted on Nov 21, 201519 Hilarious Tweets About God That'll Make You Laugh Every Time"I'll bet when Godzilla first came out, God was like 'Damn, that name's way cooler.'"by Jarry LeeBuzzFeed StaffLinkFacebookPinterestTwitterMail 1. Eat Wood @therealeatwood GOD: How many more animals left to make? ANGEL: 2 GOD: And how many more legs do we have? ANGEL: 100 CENTIPEDE: dibs! SNAKE: asshole 11:13 PM - 29 Jun 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 2. Online Hippo @InternetHippo [god super drunk making humans] LOL what if in childhood they lose all their teeth & then it's like jk here are some new ones 10:27 PM - 04 Feb 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 3. Elle Oh H-e-double L @ElleOhHell I'll bet when Godzilla first came out, God was like "Damn, that name's way cooler." 02:50 PM - 01 May 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 4. Bridger Winegar @bridger_w Anyone who asks, "Why does God let bad things happen to people" has clearly never purposefully drowned one of their Sims in a pool 12:51 AM - 28 Jul 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 5. shut up, mike @shutupmikeginn Noah: Two? Why two of every animal? [God whispers in Noah's ear] Noah: nice lol 10:46 PM - 30 Mar 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 6. frankenmustard @nice_mustard "drink my blood" that's wine dude "eat my flesh" um you're weirding me out "i'm god" this is the worst going away party ever 10:53 PM - 09 May 2012 Reply Retweet Favorite 7. Nathan Usher @thenatewolf *Meets god* You're real, eh? *God nods* And you saw all of that? *God nods* ... I'll see myself out 04:40 PM - 23 Jun 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 8. Nathan Usher @thenatewolf God's Assistant: really? Leather wings on a mouse's body? I think you're just in a bad mood. God: ALSO MAKE IT BLIND AND SCREECHING 06:16 PM - 01 Sep 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 9. ▫️ @matt___nelson JESUS: so I'm u GOD: yes JESUS: and ur me GOD: yes JESUS: I don't get it GOD: I do JESUS: how can one of us get it & not the other GOD: whoa 08:14 PM - 28 May 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 10. MILTRON @themiltron [God creating the ocean] GOD: Just put water friggin everywhere. ANGEL: Nice, that way if they’re thirsty, they— GOD: Make it undrinkable. 02:09 AM - 08 Jun 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 11. chuuch @ch000ch god: u gotta build a boat noah: can't u build ur own boat.. i mean, ur god god: [nervously] no i can i just wanna see if u know how 05:22 AM - 31 May 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 12. Fred Delicious @Fred_Delicious *Jesus excitedly runs home from school* "dad, dad! I made the football team" *God peers over his newspaper* "well i made FUCKING EVERYTHING" 02:41 PM - 14 Aug 2013 Reply Retweet Favorite 13. Saucy Kensington @Book_Krazy SATAN: What's that? God: An angel to comfort people. What's that? SATAN: A goat to scare people GOD: Its so cute [Goat screams] GOD: OH DAMN 02:08 AM - 03 Jul 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 14. Steve Suckington @SteveSuckington "Only god can judge me" *god interrupts* -you're a douchebag 06:49 AM - 23 Feb 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 15. audrey farnsworth @audipenny [god, creating ducks] Just like put a surfboard mouth on a big pigeon and make it like a loud idiot. I don't know 05:29 AM - 15 Jan 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 16. PapeяWash© @PaperWash God: kill your son Abraham: uh...ok God: holy shit I'm jk Abraham: umm... God: I'll probably kill mine tho lol Abraham: wtf? 11:57 PM - 11 Nov 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 17. David Hughes @david8hughes God: done? Noah: yea G: whats this Noah proudly: a swing set G: u built a park. I asked for an ark N: a what? G: a boat N: say boat then 02:26 PM - 09 Jan 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 18. jackson @tricycle_champ [god making chimps] GOD: shrink a gorilla & make it smart ANGEL: Ok. And what sound should it make? G: literally just have it fucking scream 05:18 PM - 13 Jun 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 19. russell alton @Choplogik @jonnysun GOD: welcom, my son, to my eternal kingdom ME: knew id get here heaventually GOD: that's it. get out. back to hell with u 07:07 PM - 19 Jul 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite