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The 30 Things That Happen When You Get A Gigantic Zit

Stay strong.

1. At first, you can’t see it…

2. But you know it’s coming.

3. You can feel it…lurking underneath the surface.

4. And when it arrives, it is a monster.

(Like this, but on your face.)

5. But you know what you have to do…

6. Kill it with fire!!!!!!!!

7. So you start rubbing…

8. And digging…

9. And pretty much ripping your face off.

10. Which, of course, only makes it stronger.

Maybe it even causes some other friends to sprout up.

11. So you try to hide it with makeup.

13. Same goes for trying to disguise it with distracting clothing.

14. Desperate, you turn to the internet in search of home remedies.

15. Like lemon juice.

17. And…numerology?

That can’t be right.

18. And some far too troubling to even name.

Gross.

19. But no matter what you try, it’s still there.

20. So, realizing you have no other choice…

21. You walk out into the world.

22. Ready to face the judgmental stares of strangers and friends alike.

This is what you know everyone will do when they see you.

23. But no one cringes and screams.

No one does this.

24. And no one runs away.

No one does this either.

25. Because really? It’s just a zit.

What’s the big deal?

26. And even if you do finally get that motherfucker to pop…

Ew.

27. Or it stays on your face forever…

Even if we’re talking zits plural, here.

29. Because zit or no zit(s), you’re always gonna be you. And you?

30. You’re fabulous.

Go get ‘em, champ.

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