1. Humans minds can be controlled by a simple man and his laptop.
2. Why do humans insist on covering everything they eat with blood?
3. Humans have these tiny balls of fur they pick up after, feed, let live in their houses, and allow to do whatever they want.
4. Earthlings take sick pleasure in controlling miniature, virtual versions of themselves when they are not busy trying to control real humans in real life.
5. These silly beings carry protective coverings used to shield them from falling water when they are mostly water anyways.
6. Human, you are leaking from your face...
7. Every so often, humans will attempt to remove the threads that sprout from their heads.
8. One human will willingly choose to commit itself to another human forever in front of all these people who later laugh and throw things at them.
9. A few times a day humans take pictures of themselves on portable devices just to make sure that they are still all there.
10. Sometimes humans will close one eye if they want to start conversation. Other times they will close both eyes if they don't want to talk at all.
This is all very perplexing for beings with less than or more than two eyes.