1. The only right answer to "do we have enough bacon?" is "GET ME MORE BACON!"
2. Bitches love toast.
3. The taste of your food is directly proportional to how it looks on instagram.
4. Treat your meat to a hip-hop beat.
5. If your cake looks like your face... you dun' good!
6. The secret ingredient is almost always COLOR.
7. Eggrolls are a girl's best friend.
8. There is literally NOTHING that doesn't taste good in a muffin.
9. Moderation is key.
10. If you want to eat it bad enough, you can make it edible.
11. Artisanal is always better.
12. Just go for it.
