1. Nuclear Power Plant Security Guard
Costume benefits: None of your exes will recognize you underneath all that gear.
Post-apocalyptic benefits: None of the radiation fallout particles will enter your lungs under all that gear.
2. Bionic Woman
Costume benefits: You’ll look like yourself, just with a few extra bells and whistles.
Post-apocalyptic benefits: Bells and whistles will keep you alive.
3. Mountain Man
Costume benefits: It allows you to leave directly from the Halloween party to spend the weekend upstate.
Post-apocalyptic benefits: It allows you to stay upstate for more than a weekend.
Costume benefits: The fully enclosed metal suit will protect you from messy pranks or spilled drinks.
Post-apocalyptic benefits: The fully enclosed metal suit will protect you from acid rain, so you’ll be free to roam in any condition.
Costume benefits: Your legs will get toned from walking in the tight fin all day.
Post-apocalyptic benefits: Your body will survive swimming in an underwater world all day.
Costume benefits: You can shoot arrows at pumpkins for fun.
Post-apocalyptic benefits: You can shoot arrows at prey for sustenance.
7. Ax Murderer
Costume benefits: Everyone will be inspired to sing that Lizzie Borden rhyme.
Post-apocalyptic benefits: Everyone will be inspired to keep their distance from you.
8. Zombie Business Professional
Costume benefits: You can wear it to work and still follow the dress code.
Post-apocalyptic benefits: You’ll fit in because, well, everyone might be zombies.
9. Water Jug Guy
Costume benefits: Everyone loves the guy with the water!
Post-apocalyptic benefits: Everyone will love the guy with the water!
Costume benefits: It doesn’t take much prep work, and it’s a look that will be around every year.
Post-apocalyptic benefits: The sheet could easily double as shelter — or a poncho at least.
11. Edward Scissorhands
Costume benefits: Everyone will think you’re adorable.
Post-apocalyptic benefits: Weapons, utensils, digging tools — you know the drill.
Costume benefits: You only need to buy one item.
Post-apocalyptic benefits: If you run out of toilet paper, you’ll be fine for a while.
13. Sexy Nurse
Costume benefits: People will seek you out for some special medical help. ;)
Post-apocalyptic benefits: People will seek you out for some special medical help. No, seriously, they’ll want your first aid kit.
14. Whoopie Cushion
Costume benefits: No one will take you too seriously.
Post-apocalyptic benefits: You can blow it up into a raft.
Costume benefits: You can reuse your costume in December.
Post-apocalyptic benefits: You’ll stay insulated, and your bag will store provisions nicely.