2. Oh hell no. I did not get this dressed up to go home early. Everyone needs to bask in my magnificence.
3. Not prepared? Bitch please, my outfit can go from professional to par-tay in .5 seconds.
4. Who needs Apple Bottom jeans when you got natural Pom-Pom bottom am I right?
5. Awwww yesssss, the DJ just dropped the bass.
6. Hey pretty lady, you want to dance? No? No. That’s cool.
7. Hey gurl, you like what I’m working with?
8. I’m always wearin’ a bow tie in da club. Bow ties are cool.
9. Oh you did not just call me fat.
10. Why yes, I am popped collar cool.
11. Awwww yeah, this song is my jam!
12. Dancing by myself because I want to. It’s empowering, dammit.
13. Are these tail feathers on my head, or am I just happy to see you?
Both. The answer is both.
14. You like Batman? Gurl, I am the night.
15. I’m not drunk, I’m not drunk. Hruk! Okay, call the cab.
- Turkey's military released an audio recording of what it says were warnings to the Russian warplane before it was downed near Syria's border. ›
- Protesters marched in Chicago for the second night in a row after the release of a video showing the police shooting of black teen Laquan McDonald. ›
- And President Obama actually made his daughters laugh at the annual White House turkey pardon. ›